Hi, I just joined today. I'm feeling really low at the mom

Hi, I just joined today.
I'm feeling really low at the moment. I have been trying to lose weight on and off for almost 10 years. Every now and then I managed to lose a bit, but then I go and put it back on again. It's so depressing having to start over again and again. I'm just starting to feel really hopeless - like I'll never actually be able to do it. I've tried so many things recently. My boyfriend and I set up a facebook group to motivate each other but that hasn't helped. I bought a fitbit and hardly ever use it properly. I write in my diary but only when I'm motivated (so it's hardly helpful when I actually need it). I spent last sunday meal prepping so that we'd have enough healthy snacks to last us the week, only to go buy loads of crap from different shops on my journey to and from work. I signed up to a swimathon but I'm not training as much as I was going to. I'm with a very supportive boyfriend but he gives up so easily and it's really having a bad impact on me. I just don't know what to do. One minute I'm motivated, then next minute I'm thinking 'f*** it' and I binge eat. Then I hate myself.

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Feb 13, 2017

I understand. I havent been working that long to lose it (I put it on about 2 years ago) But i completely understand how hopeless it can be. Just stick in there, something I've realized after I gained the weight (I gained it shortly after I reached at my lowest weight) is that after you lose the weight you still need to maintain the lifestyle that allowed you to lose the weight. hang in there.

ShellyLynne2611's picture
Feb 16, 2017

I just signed up today. I could have written your message. That is exactly how I am. My swings are getting more extreme. I literally go from one good day to one awful day. I can't trust myself to go to the store because I constantly buy chips and ice cream and soda. I have had some great times in the past when I did really well. I can't seem to get myself into the place I was in.

Are you following a specific type of weight loss program or just doing your own thing? Is it possible that you are being too restrictive and that's why you are rebelling with the junk food? My suggestion would be to take one thing at a time and focus on that. For me, that is stopping the obvious junk food. Example: I can eat frozen processed meals which might not be super healthy but keep me from ordering pizza, but I'll work to avoid chips, candy, soda and pizza. Another suggestion would be to write down everything you eat, good or bad. Try not to stress about it. Don't worry about being perfect. Just try to work on one healthy decision at a time. Eventually they will increase. I would also suggest meditation or just deep breathing where you try to sort through your feelings about food and yourself and what your goals are. Are they realistic? Make sure to love yourself now, just the way you are. Weight is just a number that indicates your relationship with gravity. It isn't who you are.

I'm glad you have a support system. He sounds like my husband. He's great, but there's only so much he can do. It's hard to put the focus just on you, but sometimes that's what you have to do. Step back and tell yourself that you can't be his mirror. You have to fight through the urge to give up when he does. (My husband and I are each others enablers. It's SO hard to break through that.) Maybe try focusing on being a good influence for him? Like a chain reaction. You being stronger makes him stronger which makes you stronger, etc.

Sorry for rambling. For what it's worth, I would love to join your facebook group if you are open to that. I don't post much about my efforts, but I don't think most of my fb friends are interested. Maybe we can help each other. Let me know. I hope this helps.

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