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New to the group and sadly in need of some support from some

New to the group and sadly in need of some support from some loving vegans.
My sad tale:
I was vegetarian when I met my now husband. I was a vegetarian for 17 years, the only thing non vegan thing I consumed was feta. I have been fully vegan for 2.5 years now, and never going back.
2 months ago my husband said that I have changed and he can't handle it.
I only cook vegan food and whoever wants to eat it can. If he wants meat then he can cook it himself. I haven't cooked meat for years.
Recently just washing his dishes makes me gag so I told him I can't wash his dishes anymore. He has given me an ultimatum. If I don't start washing his dishes he wants a divorce. I told him I just can't, it makes me sick. He doesn't care..
This man used to be so caring and I am at a complete loss to understand how he can be this way. I feel like I'm in the twilight zone. It's unbelievable that me being vegan will be the end of my marriage.
He has already started to pack..

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Same thing happened to my marriage. My spouse refused to even acknowledge the torture that the animals endure. I stopped going out to eat because I can't even watch people eat non-vegan food without it turning my stomach. My spouse said I was being selfish and disrespectful holier than though because I won't go out with family to eat. How can people be so blind?

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spoonleg's picture
[225]
Sep 15

Yes!! I have a potluck to go to tomorrow, but I think I won't go because I just heard someone is bringing a "pork shoulder". I have an easier time ignoring the less-blatant dishes containing meat (like a stew, casserole, enchilada) at a potluck, but the slab-o-meat iis too in-my-face; I can't pretend ignorance to myself. I feel staying and not saying anything is like I'm condoning it. To me, it's like this analogy: what if someone invited you to dinner at their house, and, among other dishes, they were serving part of the dead body of a child of some race they considered inferior or subhuman. Would you stay and just not eat that dish, or would you leave?

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ColeC's picture
[270]
Sep 23

I don't see why he cannot make a compromise. It wont be many dishes he has to wash if you both eat something different so what i feel like he is doing is to try to force is way on you. He doesnt wanna be a vegan, thats his decision. You are a vegan for very good reasons that all vegans are aware of. animals, environment, health. You are doing something really good and he should acknowledge that and wash those few dishes because i am sure you do plenty of other things around the house already too. Apart from all of this, my partner telling me they don't wanna be with me anymore because i dont want to wash their meat dishes, makes me question how much they actually love me if they are willing to discard me this easily over a few plates. It almost seems like blackmail to me. manipulating you to do as he wishes or face the consequences and thats pretty nasty to me.

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