I have lost hope. I never realized how important that small

I have lost hope. I never realized how important that small word is...hope. If you have it there is a chance, if you do not have it, what is the point of going on? I had planned to have things finished 2 weeks ago, but a service intervened. My life has come crashing down and been ruined. My wife is being really supportive, but I don't know how much longer she can take me. This is the darkest, deepest place I've ever been and I see no way out.