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I have decided there's no worth or sense to living anymore.

BlackLily's picture
[9575]

I have decided there's no worth or sense to living anymore. I don't want to be here, I'm done. I want to die, nothing is going right, and I just feel very hopeless, worthless, and just not good enough. I keep debating a psych ward, but I'm just unsure. My therapist suggested medications because I have been barely sleeping, I'm lucky if I even get four hours of sleep. Between my PTSD, MDD, BPD, ADHD, high anxiety, and emotional disturbance; it's a lot to deal with. I'd rather just give up than deal with it because what I do hasn't ever been okay to other people in which I did it for. All of my disorders are putting me through hell right now; the chest tightening, the feelings of hopelessness, quick to being irritable, unable to concentrate, flashbacks, and sometimes not able to eat. I feel very disconnected with myself and the world around me, I'm dissociating every single day, and I feel like there's no way out of this. On the inside I feel like a Lego house without any windows or doors to air out the emotions and to let me out. I feel trapped and I've felt this way for a very long time. I'm tired of feeling all of this and don't want to do it anymore or even try. I've been dealing with all of this for seven years, I think it's quite time I've had enough.

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BlackLily's picture
[9575]
Jul 13

@Error101 I'm not sure I just started on it.

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Error101's picture
[86925]
Jul 14

@BlackLily Do you have a headache everyday? I'm wondering

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[860]
Jul 15

Hope you are feeling better. Your hobbies and interests you listed sound amazing. You have a lot going for you. Hang in there, friend. Please hold onto the fact that you are enough and you are good!

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