As my suicidal thoughts take control, I ponder why I'm not r

As my suicidal thoughts take control, I ponder why I'm not really getting the help I need. How certain medication for depression and anxiety actually increases the likelihood of suicide ideation. How you really have to do your own research instead of just trusting the person with the degree who prescribed you medication after only 45mins of knowing you. It's sad that we live in a world where saying you're suicidal gets you called crazy so you better watch what you say. Same goes for depression. All this to say, that the chosen are really being attacked. Intuitive people. "Sensitive people". People who are strong in faith. Very passionate and compassionate people. We are all supposed to be made in god's image but only few are chosen. I hate realizing how lonely it can all be. I hate that I have to do my own research and go hey I'm really dealing with spiritual warfare and no one really believes in demons being real and taking over souls. How people of faith and in the church won't really help someone whose needs to be protected from the enemy. How going to some churches just isn't safe any more. I have realized that jezebel spirit has been apart of my life. I let her spirit take over me unknowingly. I prayed all the time and then eventually I stopped praying and stopped believing. This all hard to deal with alone. But I get now that if I'm going to make it and cast the spirit away from me that I have to acknowledge how real the spirits are. Not just God but angels too. Not just God and angels but the devil and demons too. I realize I have needed spiritual help and guidance but instead was met with judgement and an attack on my mental health. All people should pay attention to the bible as much as possible really because all of the attacks are occuring and most of us are making it about "self-love" instead of praying for people to actually find their way. Saying you'll pray but don't actually pray isn't helpful. We have to pray for more than just ourselves and people we hold dear. How many people actually pray for complete strangers? I just want to stop having suicidal thoughts so often. It seems a calling from God is the only way I'm going to get better. At least I hope.

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andine's picture
(75900)
Sep 14

I hope that your faith gives you comfort and support. I believe in prayer but I also believe in therapy and medical care. If feel you are not receiving the proper medical advice, then please if you can find another provider who is more well suited to your needs and possibly has more experience and success. Psychology today website provides a list of local practitioners and their qualifications. Hope that helps. Best wishes.

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