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My mother wanted me to join a shopping addiction support gro

My mother wanted me to join a shopping addiction support group because instead of doing drugs or drinking too much to
numb the pain of assault in a previous relationship I buy things to fill the raging sadness. When my grandmother passed away in 1971 they found over $20,000 of clothes with the still on them in the back of her trunk. I think my mom fears I’m going to end up on the path her mom did when she was 11. I can’t save money and feel as though the only way not to spend it is to stay in. But then there is online shopping and flex pay which makes me put reason behind my purchases like ‘oh but it’s only $32 this week’ I know I need help but it’s scary to ask for it. I’m 24 and feel as though I’ll never have enough money for a house or even just stability. I also have ptsd and have to pay service dog funds next week. I got a promotion at work and hope with it I’ll save
more. I just don’t know anymore...

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 1
Tundra's picture
[2130]
Sep 12

I have a shopping issues as well, but do not have as much money as you do or any way to spend 20k worth of stuff, but I understand. It makes me feel better to shop. I shop because I am lonely. I tend to shop when I feel neglected and I also shop when I want time to pass by faster because I am bored.................................

Are you aware of the consequences of shopping too much? You could be in extreme debt, like you said, you may never be able to buy a house. It would make it difficult for you to ever be in a healthy relationship because it would cause issues in your relationship. You could possibly lose everything and end up living with someone for the rest of your life. It could also lead to gambling or hording as well, unable to get rid off anything you buy. Eventually, you could end up becoming someone no one respects. You won't respect yourself. You'll end up depressed and disgusted with yourself.........................

I recommend setting limitations for yourself. It also helps to have a few people that support you in ceasing these bad habits. When you go shopping take someone with you like your mother. Always. If you are shopping online try to have a set budget for yourself even before you start shopping and no matter what you buy it has to equal this budget. Be sure to talk with your mom or whoever truly loves/supports you about it that way they can check to make sure you did it..............................

Have you ever heard of being thrifty and bargain hunting? It's a form of shopping, but it's fun and it teaches you how to find the lowest cost of an item. It's like a game, it's time consuming and it makes you feel good when you end up purchasing a vacuum that you researched and verified is cheaper. It's important you're only buying things that make your life better and that you will use...............................

Also, I am sorry you're going through all this stuff in life. I've been there. I'm glad you have a job and a mother that cares about you. You have a problem but you are addressing it early on in life, not waiting for it to get worse. That's all we humans can really do is make mistakes, learn from our mistakes, and keep growing as people :)

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