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Just diagnosed with HSV1 and HSV2. Help!


Hello, I'm Liem and just found out 3 days ago that I tested positive for HSV1 and 2.

I had too much to drink a few weeks ago and had unprotected sex with a girl, who I later found out was a little 'loose'. I just got out of a seven year relationship (I'm 27) with the love of my life and was very lonely. Now I'm scared, depressed and to be honest considering suicide. I've never thought I would ever consider taking my own life, but here I am. It feels like I can't ever enjoy anything as much as I did before the diagnosis. Movies aren't as good or funny. I can't have fun with my friends like I used to. I have told no one, not even the girl that infected me. I read somewhere that it takes 12 weeks for proper diagnosis, but I tested positive after only 2 weeks.( and yes, I know that I didn't already have the disease)

My ex girlfriend and I have been hanging out the past two weekends and I'm still very much in love with her, but I couldn't imagine telling her about my diagnosis. I don't know what to do. I wish I could just talk face to face with someone who is in my same situation. I can think of nothing else

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overwhelmed123's picture
Feb 3, 2012

hsv is most definitely NOT a reason for suicide!! anyone that is feeling that way needs to call a suicide hotline or see their doctor immediately. be honest. there are other issues at work there if you are feeling that way. i take an antidepressant and have for several years. after the diagnosis i dealt with it well then last month i bottomed out. i think the virus can mess with the chemical balance or perhaps the valtrex has decreased the effectiveness of the lexapro. but i recognized the issue as not being one that can be dealt with with suicide.

suicide because you dont want to tell someone you have hsv? thats like hunting rabbits with a machine gun! i have told several one cares! 2 say their ex wives have it. i have told several friends...they all know someone who has it. 1 in 5 people!! think about that when you look at the crowds of people in the stands at the superbowl! do they look any different from you or i? no! do they have people who love them? oh yea!

the hsv is not going to stop you from having wonderful relationships...course...its not gonna stop you from having crappy ones either! if you had problems in a relationship will have them now. if it didnt work wont work now.

And Liem....that girl having HSV has nothing to do with being "loose". Please remember that. I enjoy sex...always have. Greatly enjoyed no strings attached sex when I wasnt in a relationship. Never got anything. Not even a bacterial infection. Stopped doing all that...met a widower 51 years old. Developed a relationship. had sex. I was the 3rd woman he had slept with since his wife passed away...the first one gave him HSV. he didnt know and gave it to me. Did that make either of us "loose"?

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smurfette5's picture
Feb 9, 2012

I never said i was a reason for suicide. I said the article more clearly defined for me why I was feeling the way I was, and helped outline the social stigma in more concrete terms for me. So now I know what people understand, generally, and what they dont, and what misconceptions are out there.

Feb 9, 2012

To Ashley27: Thank you for your comments about talking to someone, hopefully it will help me have the courage to talk to my family or close friends about it. I feel like it is a little too much of a burden to carry on my own right now.
To Liem: I just found out yesterday, so I know how you feel. Last night I was, no joke, considering suicide myself. But then I had to remind myself of the people in my life who would be more disappointed in me for not sharing my burden than they would be in finding out that I have herpes. Like I have seen in these comments before, it is just a virus, don't let it define you or the life you lead. I am 26 years old, I work at a job I am far over qualified for and don't enjoy, I live in my parents attic, I got fired from a job I liked in October, I am in debt past my ears, but I am still managing to find light in places in my life. Look for the light. I find it in my family and my dog and with my friends. I escape in books and run a lot. I'm volunteering with Habitats for Humanity. I can't let this added 'negative' overload me and push me over the edge. I wake up every day and remind myself of everything in my life that I am greatful for, and do it again before I go to sleep. I've been doing this awhile already trying to deal with pre-existing dsepression, and it seems to help me. It doesn't make the negative things go away, but it brings perspective. Also, I'm sure you have other things going on in your life, as everyone does, but taking your own life because of an HSV diagnosis seems like an extreme response to something that in the end, is just a virus. Yes, it will make your life a bit more challenging, but don't let it take your life entirely. Good luck!

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