I have battled depression all my life! I have been on EVERY

I have battled depression all my life! I have been on EVERY anti-depressant under the sun, seen over 20 "professionals" all to no avail.
I am not an optimist, nor a pessimist, I AM a realist!
To sum life up: We work, pay bills, watch loved ones pass away, stuff breaks, we see so much unfairness in our world-life-jobs and nothing we can do about it---then we die. WOW! What a thrill huh?
Plus I have ALWAYS hated myself---my physique, or lack thereof---never could gain muscle size and mass, despite working out-taking supplements, eating right, even did steroids-once-big mistake, I had all the side effects, but nothing positive.
I also battle hair loss---again, took Propecia, Minoxidil, etc...all to no avail....will not consider transplant, as I have read and seen the horror stories that go with it! It is gut wrenching to see men with full heads of hair, then look at myself....what a rip off/raw deal I got!
I have attempted ending it all--twice.....I will listen to ANY advice!!! As "professionals" with their CBT methods of focus on this not that---is like saying, you are burning up--literally by fire-but do not focus on that, instead, refocus on the three seconds a day somebody sprays a water gun on you---yeah, what a relief, huh??

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May 4

I’m so sorry to hear this. That really sounds terrible. I know you said you are a realist, but you only mentioned the negatives of life. I dont know much about you, and everyone has different types of blessing and trials but you always have God. Watching loved ones pass if a very hard thing to go through, but be grateful that you had loved ones there to spend time with and that cared for you. Try to think of the happy memories you have with people you love, and do things to get your mind off of whatever you might be going through. Sorry if this isn’t helpful, it might be kind of dumb. But know that I care about you, and am here if you just need someone to listen to you.


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