I don't really know how I fit in here but I figured it made

I don't really know how I fit in here but I figured it made more sense to on through this group than the Bipolar group. I at least know that most of those on here hear voices or see things. I'm schitzoaffective and I really feel like I need to go to the hospital or something really bad is going to happen but my doctor and caretakers all say I don't need to. I want to just believe them because now I'm medicated and not nearly has bad as I was a few months ago but I just feel really unsafe. I'm not suicidal and I'm not a danger to others but I'm feeling super off and the last time I felt this way was my first time having a psychotic break. It's been going on for a week that I've felt I should go to a hospital. Maybe a day program is what I need instead... when I discussed it with my mom again tonight one of the voices said "she[myself] is going to kill herself" and that scared me. I don't like feeling like I'm out of control of my actions and that's how I feel. But I'm not acting out like I would when I'm hypomanic. I'm just really scared and feel like I need extra support right now. I keep having episodes at work and I feel like I'm going to lose another job again and that I wasn't ready to work again (I was manic when I put in the application). I'm just so tired. The psychosis is wearing me down thin and I just don't know what I'm going to do anymore. I have my head to the ground thinking theres people in the floorboards because of my paranoia and thoughts that my mother is trying to kill me. I just don't know what to do anymore.

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Jennipain's picture
Aug 14

If you feel unsafe and feel that you might harm yourself please please go to the ER and get the proper help. xo

Aug 14

I haven't had any command hallucinations in months though and I'm realizing I'm not a danger to myself or others but I really appreciate you encouraging I go. I'm actually starting an outpatient program on Wednesday and seeing my therapist earlier this week now so tomorrow. I hope that helps me. Again, I really appreciate it


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