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Guys? I need your help. What do I do if I'm trying to

xXBeautifully-CorrodedXx's picture
[8385]

Guys?

I need your help.

What do I do if I'm trying to talk to somebody and they don't validate me when I'm trying to explain to them what they did to hurt my feelings?

This person is complaining that instead of talking through what happened that I just walked away from the conversation, but it was because I started this conversation. I was trying to get this person to understand that they hurt my feelings by doing what they did and instead they try to explain why they hurt my feelings. Rather than validate how I was feeling. And rather than validating how I was feeling they admitted that they were not going to validate how I felt because he felt forced into being understood how I was feeling.

I ask this person what they wanted from me since they felt like I was poorly communicating with them, and he said that he wants me to just talk and listen. But how can I talk and listen if he's not willing to listen to me? If he's not willing to listen to how I feel because honestly, what do I do then? I tried to explain how it made me feel when he did what he did and yet he just explained it away as in like, "oh? These are your feelings but I don't care because this is why I did what I did."

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xXBeautifully-CorrodedXx's picture
[8385]
11 hours ago

@SimonaAlex @luna1994
Hello. Honestly I've been hesitant to want to answer anybody's questions related to what you both have asked because I feel like I'm probably being judged or look down upon due to the fact that oh, yes I am still talking to my ex-boyfriend. And yes this is about him.

I keep him around for practice. I know that doesn't make sense to some people but my therapist thought that it would be good for me too practice setting up boundaries and trying to talk with someone like my former partner in order to grow. Things have gotten a little bit easier now. for me. Maybe not for me and my former partner. But I'm counting the progress that I've made since this incident as something important.

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luna1994's picture
[26860]
1 hour ago

@xXBeautifully-CorrodedXx well yeah its just how it i guess people will judge if you still talking to an ex from my perspective a ex is an ex for a reason why keep trying to waste time with them if that relationship is over.

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luna1994's picture
[26860]
21 minutes ago

@xXBeautifully-CorrodedXx i understand are you going back to your ex or just friends ?

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