Feeling mixed emotions. My husband and I are expecting a sec

Feeling mixed emotions. My husband and I are expecting a second baby, and we've had our son in daycare since shortly after he was born. We did this because we both work a day shift and didn't have the option to switch to another shift. Anyway, we've made it work financially til now. There's no way we can afford 2 in daycare. I'm now an assistant supervisor in my depth and there are no openings on the other shits - if there were, there are people on both shifts who would make my life a living hell. My husband does have the option to move to a night shift, but there are people on that shift who don't like him and would make every night a nightmare. He's been holding out for a rumored job in another depth on the evening dhift, but it's been months. He's vocalize his displeasure that he's the one who has to move shifts -many times, including today - and saying I have the option too -which I truly don't - and saying it's not fair for him; that he'sthe one sacrificing. How is this my fault? We wanted to have another child and we BOTH knew we couldn't afford more $ to go to daycare. I know it's really upsetting for him, but I don't know what else to do. I can't move to another department because they're all much more physical which I can't handle, especially right now. I'd stay home if we could afford it, but we can't survive off of a single income.
Every time I feel like we've come to an agreement that it's best for us to work opposite shifts, he does this and seriously acts like it's my fault and that he always has to settle or make the sacrifice.
The plus side to him being on a different shift is no more daycare, we could actually save $ so we can pay off debts, our kids wouldn't be exposed to all sorts off illness at a daycare and we'd know exactly what went on during their daily lives - we've had shady stories told to us when our son got hurt at daycare. If we save enough $, maybe I COULD quit and my husband could go back to a day shift. Who knows? But I feel like it's the responsible choice and is financially and familially best for us.
Am I in the wrong?

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CKBlossom's picture
Mar 20, 2017

I feel like this has to be hard for both of you, but saving the money seems to be the goal and being home with your kiddos would be wonderful, so could you both apply for different options and then evaluate who should switch?


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