Briefly - on Dec. 15 I found my partner of 40 years dead in

Briefly - on Dec. 15 I found my partner of 40 years dead in bed of a heart attack. Four days later I had trouble breathing, I thought I would suffocate. Went to the ER, they told me I had a mass of polyps on my vocal chords. Emergency surgery the next day. Out of the hospital, into rehab because laying in bed in the hospital for a week weakened me. At 72 I'm not as strong as I used to be. Came home Jan. 9. Now I'm alone. Problem is I keep having panic attack symptoms every day. Before that I had them pretty much under control with herbal supplements. The hospital told me I had an enlarged heart - the night before the operation I was told my heart was fine. I've always had good reports on my heart and everything else, never sick, no health problems. One of the PA symptoms I've been getting is small chest pains. It's frightening in view of the heart problem I now have. I can't sleep, I've only been sleeping 4-5 hours a night. I keep having fearful thoughts - I picture myself laying on the floor, alone, dead from a heart attack and other similar scary thoughts. This isn't helping with the panic attacks. So here I am, just looking for a place to go, a place where I can voice my problems, a place where people understand PA. If you've never had one you can't understand them. There's more but that's the gist of it.

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Jan 24

@kvolm2016 YW! For several years after I retired in 2011 I wrote articles on the subject of alternative medicine. I learned a lot. I had been involved in it for quite a few years before that, upon retiring I had the time to write about it. Thank you for such a positive reply and for responding to me here, I do appreciate it. It's very lonely here now, I'm alone with no one to keep me company or talk to me, other than my two nieces and the husband of one of them. Of course, they work and have their own lives but do make time for me when they can. And I have other problems that I haven't touched on here. I've had panic attacks all week, although the herbal supplements I take stop them in about 30-40 minutes but I'm still left feeling exhausted. Thanks again. :)

Jan 27

@Trilby96 Then you are quite the resident expert and I may call on knowledge in the future!
Also wanted to share a resource for future use when you are more physically recovered and ready to work on grief healing. The organization GriefShare: is very good and helps you get connected with others who have experienced the same loss. This could be a good group for combating the loneliness.
Hope you can get some rest and relief soon!

Jan 27

@kvolm2016 Thank you! I checked the site - I found one place not far from me. Regarding alternative medicine - I wish I were an expert. LOL It's a field I should have gone into years ago but I never knew about things like that or even thought seriously about it back in the '70s-'80s. I do have good sites to go to though, and can tell you anything I have knowledge of. But of course doing your own research is critical. I believe I can point you in the right direction. There's also a really good book titled "Solve It With Supplements" by Robert A. Schulman, MD. You can probably find it in the library, it was written in 2007. I wish he'd write an updated version. My personal opinion is that a Naturopathic doctor is best but they're expensive and Medicare doesn't cover them. I don't think insurance companies do either although I'm not sure about that. Thanks so much for replying to me. I appreciate it. :)


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