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Theres this girl on my school shes really pretty. Somehow i

Theres this girl on my school shes really pretty. Somehow i see her everywhere and its making me soooooo uncomfortable because it makes me feel like its a crush but i dont wanna do anything but i just get these fake butterflies and my mind is like you like her secretly dont you? But i really dont i just dont want these fale feelings to be here why are they here so mad about it. You remeber when you liked a boy somehow you always saw him? Well that the same with her its like this movie whete thhe girl suddenly starts liking another girl thats what it teminds me of AND ITS HORRIBLE like noooo oplease let me crush on guys i know its a fake crush but my brain keeps saying its real and it isnt quincedance that i keep seeing her. Also she has short hair and like a boyish style but very girly and ugh she could even be lesbian herself u never know its so triggering everytike i see her im like ughhhh girl hell nah i dont want to do anything with you but my mind says, you like her you just dont know het. It feels nothing like a real crush nothing. Also whenever she does soemtimg my brain starts to find something she does and be like omg thats so attractive while ik like nooope this aint it. U know when u like a boy and everything he does suddenly becomes attractive? Well thats whats my brains tryna recreate with that girl and kts horrible and annoying....

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Omg this message looks so mych like im supressinng being gay i think im gonna have a panic atack omgg lil more thing. Theres this guy in a netflix show and i would be sooo attracted to him if i didnt have hocd. I know it sounds weird but hes exaactly my type and now im not feeling anyrhing for him???? I haaaaate it i want feelings for him soo bad im litteraly craving the feelings... also when girls have conversations about celebries its so weird bevause i used to crush on them too before hocd and now i cant talk with them about how cute the guy is like i can relate to yall but it just my mind doesnt feel the same anymore its so annoying. Also about the fale girl crush thingy, remeber when u saw a prwtty girl u was just like omg shed be so cool to be FRIENDS with or wish i WAS her but now my mind tricks me in to thinking that i wanna be WITH her???? What is that why am i changed. I cant me be

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