The longer I'm away from my Ex, I am seeing my insecurities

The longer I'm away from my Ex, I am seeing my insecurities more and more. It would drive a same person nuts.

She was never diagnosed as narcissit, probably just like many in here, their ex was never officially diagnosed.

What I do know, it's what we had wasn't working. I've had my therapist say she is narcissit. It is getting less and less important to me if she was, or wasn't. All I can change is me, and what we had brought out a lot in me I need to work on.

I still need a lot of work to really trust in myself if I'd ever what to associate with her again. I know it always ended with me apologizing or feeling resentment when I wanted to talk to her "one" more time. I'm slowly working it out, for now, I can't talk to her, I would be so scared I would reset to where I was 22 days ago. Still can't believe it's been 22 days.

I'm putting it into the hands of my higher power. If she isn't narcissit, I know if we are good for each other it will happen. But it won't be me contacting her.

I'm just on a weird place right now. I still miss the shot out of her, and feel horrible for all the blaming I did because of my insecurities. But she doesn't feel nothing for everything she has said to me, some very, very harsh stuff.

Seems I go back and forth a lot. Hopefully in time, the picture keeps getting more and more clear. I still miss her, if she is narcissit, I know she can sense something is off with her, but she can't stomach to face it

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[83250]
Sep 11

@Ead I'm so glad to see that you're really getting it now -- and you're doing it (healing) exactly the way you're supposed to; step by step. I especially like this part: "I no longer need to convince him about anything. I don't care what he thinks. If he wants to blame me-go for it. I know the truth and the hell he put me through. And deep down inside so do they. I will take ownership of my unhealed wounds that led me to him and caused me to stay and that is it. I will own taking responsibility to heal and never look back." (By George I think she's got it. LOL!).....

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[3740]
Sep 11

@pickone LOL I think I do. And thank you, without you I could have never got this far.

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[83250]
Sep 11

@Ead Oh, thank you, but you give me too much credit. You've done it, and you deserve the credit!.....

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