One of the many frustrating things about being married to a

tabbycat65's picture
(1655)

One of the many frustrating things about being married to a covert narcissist is when you talk to anyone about his cheating ways, they think it is just porn and nothing more, it is not porn when they are with someone online or offline, and that I am being too sensitive and irrational. Doesn't help when he is going behind your back telling everyone that you are too emotional. Even if you just talk about all the weird things going on in your marriage people treat it as me blowing it out of proportion, even my own family treats me like I am overreacting. Talk about feeling isolated. Covert narcissist can act nice but it isn't real.

I have been working on myself to reverse the damage done, been a long road. I am getting better about ignoring everything he does and says, he has become unimportant to me. I think he is seeing the change in me, he has been acting differently towards me, a kind of a punishment way...lol. Sad that people don't believe the victim, and always believe the narcissist.

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tabbycat65's picture
(1655)
May 15

@kelly72Honestly, I am embarrassed for getting married to this person, it didn't feel right, there were many red flags, just goes to show how much we need to work on ourselves. On the bright side, I got to know myself, my weaknesses, and what I need to work on. For the first time, I love myself, I know I am worthy, self esteem I am still working on, it is better, but I am not completely there.

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kelly72's picture
(84590)
May 15

@tabbycat65 You are showing some very, very GOOD signs of being ready to escape that chapter of your life and never look back. I KNOW exactly what you are saying! Look forward to much better days ahead!

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(16210)
May 16

@tabbycat65 you are not alone, I also felt embarrassed for marrying the narc because the red flags almost poked my eyes out and I remember hearing a voice "screaming" within me but I still went ahead and then stayed for a further 9 years on top of the 3 years of dating.

Well done and well said! I am happy you love yourself, acknowledge your worthiness and self esteem. I don't think anyone is ever "there" completely but starting and taking one step at a time feels good and keeps us moving in the right direction.

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