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Ok, anybody think there is chance in h*ll I can get my narc

Ok, anybody think there is chance in h*ll I can get my narc wife to go to therapy? admit she lied about me and all her affairs... then I take her back? Should I just give up thinking she loved me? Chances of her changing are next to none I think, still I wonder. Again this divorce doesn't make any sense.

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@pickone that's not what I was trying to say....first I was responding to another person's comment so my comment was geared toward and narrowed by that topic...when dealing with narcissism, it's a simple fact that not everyone in a narcissistic situation will EXPERIENCE extreme abuse...but I do agree that everyone that experiences narcissistic abuse will FEEL as if it were extreme...why? bc any narcissistic abuse is awful to live through no matter how mild or extreme... narcissistic abuse is emotional and psychological and it's intent is to strip the victim of everything it can...what it IS and how it FEELS are different...bc narcissism ranges in intensity and tendencies bc it is individualistic to the perpetrators character so does the abuse the victim endures...I don't think it's a competition at all...nobody wants to have to live through it...it's horrible...but it is a fact that some people endure more than others depending on how talented or powerful their narcissist or narcissistic group is...people exposed to more extreme narcissistic tactics will have more knowledge of the depths of narcissistic abuse than those endurring milder manipulative events...are all events nasty and disgusting and hurtful: yes indeed...are all victims worthy of help and empathy and sympathy and compassion: yesss indeed ..can those in worse situations actually impart more knowledge: of course...bc as time goes on and more happens to you your experience gives you knowledge that others don't yet have...does that make you better than others: noooo...actually it makes you unfortunately more misfortunate yet more experienced in dealing with hellatious people...these nuances are exactly why most therapists are no good at understanding true narcissistic abuse...it's also why many therapists misdiagnose and why most therapists can't see the forest for the trees in narcissism...it's why victims get victimized over and over and over again...each case is different and in so it's just simple common sense to acknowledge that some are worse than others...

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[128235]
Jun 21

@overberringer I do agree with much of what you’ve said, but it is often said that perception is reality. If someone perceives that they’re being abused or mistreated than I don’t think anyone has the right to deny or invalidate their feelings. As you well know narcissistic abuse, especially from a covert narcissist, can be so well-hidden, covert, insidious, and manipulative that no one can really know the extent of damage the victim has experienced. I understand that if the situation is more extreme, then it seems obvious that the consequences of the abuse will be more extreme. But as you mentioned, it also depends on the individual narcissist, or group of narcissists. For example, the level of pathology, depravity, and malignancy (combined with socio/psychopathic traits) involved. The other variable is the individual victim, and his/her endurance threshold. Some will experience more or less damage from a similar level of abuse. But I agree with the bottom line being that any amount of narcissistic abuse is extreme to that victim, cruel, inhuman, malicious, and undeserved. I agree that each case, and the people involved, are different, and maybe it’s not as simple as better or worse. Because what may be traumatic to one person, may not be as traumatic or extreme to another one. In my opinion, the result or consequences is more subject to the individual’s interpretation of the experience. Narcissists wear down the victim’s spirit and sense of self, but they can’t completely break or destroy the spirit. Our resiliency and ability to heal and overcome a great deal of the damage over time, is proof of that........

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[6735]
Jun 21

@Cindysmilesagain Yes I have seen one since March. She has been great. It started out as well she cheated and I got kicked out. then it morphed into she is a narc and played me for a fool. I'm sure she would be willing to testify about it. I will mention to the lawyer. They do ask for her name and number on a form to the Ad Litem.

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