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Have you called out the narcissist? I have yet to find anyo

Have you called out the narcissist?
I have yet to find anyone that recommends naming it to his face, but I did anyway! I said, "You know, I think you're a narcissist, as in Narcissistic Personality Disorder." Now, my husband, the narcissist, has a psych degree from UCLA. HA! I wrote all of his papers for him, which I regret, but he did take the tests. Predictably, he said, no, he's really a very loving person, and I would realize it one day. True, I caught him lying, cheating, gaslighting, manipulating, and all the rest on a regular basis, but none of that really happened. Sure, we were married for longer than I care to admit right now, and he discarded me like so much garbage, but he still loves me, after all. In other words, I guess everyone was right. It was useless to call him out. But still, I felt I had a moral responsibility to do it. Like, if I had a mental disorder, I'd want someone to inform me. And I hope some day when he's sitting in prison for fraud or something, like Sam Vaknin, he'll remember what I told him, and try to get some help.

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Oct 17

@Living4Peace. I'm definitely going to look into this divorce idea. :)

I find the prospect of keeping people in line with firm boundaries all the time exhausting. I don't want to be standing people down all the time. I suppose it can become second nature, and you don't even think about it. But there are people that won't take advantage of you even if they can. Isn't that most people? Cluster B people are about 4% of the population, and the rest are - maybe not perfect, but basically not that bad, no? I've been so isolated by the narcissist for so long, I barely know what to expect from people any more.

Living4Peace's picture
Oct 17

@ultramarine Glad to help. :)

I do too. I deeply despise fighting. I grew up with it being the only form of communication in my house and it makes me tired just thinking about it, lol. I figure, if someone finds it difficult, or against their nature, to treat others with common decency, then they're probably not worth having in my life to any capacity. So far, the majority of people I've come across are not so great. Empathy and compassion, seem to be a rare commodity in the general public. This group is packed with caring kind people that I wish were easier to come across in life.

Daniel1018's picture
Oct 18

@ultramarine I find myself sometimes having a hard time accepting what my reality is in regards to the life I once lived. For me, she took who I was away and replaced it with someone who no longer enjoyed life. I became utterly miserable. Regaining myself back and the happiness I once had has and will continue to be a journey. For me, finally putting my hopes and dreams first and finally doing what I like is helping. To do what I truly want, I believe has sped up the time and brought back who I am. I will always be scarred and that will not go away. That will be something I cannot escape, the memories.


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