Confussed Is it possible for a narcissist to act like a nar

strangeluv2000's picture
(445)

Confussed
Is it possible for a narcissist to act like a narcissist and days, weeks, or months, later be perfectly normal till something sets them off again ???

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mmadlecl's picture
(49690)
Mar 5

@strangeluv2000 My ex husband has NPD. It took me years to figure it out and accept that there was nothing I could do to make our relationship work. Part of it was that he's a 100% disabled veteran and has PTSD (so he says). He would sometimes blame his poor behaviors on these other things. Here are some things he did that should have made me suspicious. He would roll his eyes at me for minor occurrences. He would try to embarrass me in front of other people. His emotions would be easily triggered. For instance early on we were having a conversation in my living room. Suddenly, he got up abruptly and ran into the garage like he was angry over something I said. Problem is I didn't say anything that should have upset him. I followed him, but don't recall exactly how the conversation went. However, he told me exactly what to say to appease him. I fell right into place and after I repeated what he wanted to hear, he came back in like nothing happened. He often said things that made no sense. One night when watching TV, I commented that I had climbed Washington Mountain because it was mentioned in the show. He looked at me and asked like he was annoyed, "Does that mean I didn't? Another time he called late in the evening. When I answered the phone he asked if I was going to leave him. At the time he had no reason to think this. The next day I asked him about it; he said "I didn't call you," These are just a few of the events that occurred early on. They became more frequent, more intense, and more confusing.

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strangeluv2000's picture
(445)
Mar 6

@mmadlecl It has never gotten that bad in fact we always got along the last time I saw here things were normal, she just stopped calling now she only calls maybe once a week I'm just so confused.

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mmadlecl's picture
(49690)
Mar 7

@strangeluv2000 These examples I sited are normal behaviors and communication patterns for narcissists. I'm sorry to say but it sounds like this person is losing interest in the relationship for who knows what reason. It may have not much to do with you but more to do with them. It doesn't mean you have bad traits or you are not interesting or fun. Some people need that newness of being with another person for the excitement that it affords them. All relationships move beyond that, and a mature person will recognize that these feelings must get replaced with deeper, more permanent bonding and togetherness. Possibly she is just not mature enough to be in a lasting relationship.

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