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Cheating - Narc and the "Friend" Have other experiences w

Cheating - Narc and the "Friend"

Have other experiences with these weird friendships?
When we first got to know, she told me she would "finish it" with a man. She also wrote the name of him. Another day, she mentioned him as a friend and said they had been friends for 6 months. She is in the 30s and he is a man in the 50s.
We stayed in two different cities. I visited her in February first. After my first visit, she suddenly got "anxiety" and demanded that I come down immediately. I was busy with work so it was difficult, and suggested I could come the week afterwards. She became extremely angry and accused me of lying and that I would not come. The next day she is gentle and writes "you can come whenever you want".
Well. Saturday night the same week she sends me a message "My friend is going to sleep over". I thought it seemed a bit odd. She has a sofa and a bed. But I assumed he was sleeping on the couch. The next morning she sent me messages "It was nice with my friend here, but it would have been more cozy with you! Love you a lot!".
Tuesday the week after we have a phone call together, and then she says that they saw a light in the bedroom in the middle of the night, which they thought might have been an angel. I thought it seemed strange, she said that she was sleeping in the same bed (and there is no big bed) with this friend. I said nothing to her. But she followed saying "We are just friends. I think he must be gay because he never wanted to have sex with me." I thought it seemed strange, but thought she had anxiety so it might be necessary for her to have someone there. And tried to rationalize it away.

Well. A few weeks after my second visit, she ends her relationship with me, but she wants us to become friends to see if there will be emotion over time. This friend often comes to "overnight visit" and she complains that he will only be her friend at night. I think that friendship seems very strange. But I have no feelings for her anymore, and do not really care.

Then these two will travel together to Greece. He had paid the trip, according to her. A few days before they leave, she suddenly says, "Did you know that I and he had sex before, but that we have just been friends afterwards?" We have been friends for 8 years now. "She claimed earlier in the year that he had to be gay, now they had sex. Strange, I thought. The day before they travel she is really angry with him and says this" I think he's just coming for ... yes only for.."

For some reason, I was hooked into the relationship again after this. And this was a bit forgotten.

She was a trip to Spain in late summer. She wanted me to join, but I did not dare to fly by air because of sinusitis. She used to be on the phone with me all night. I dont know why. But now more was "loving you" and more a relationship again. Then this friend travels to Spain to visit her. I honestly became skeptical and began to think about the stories from earlier this year. But I said nothing to her.
She sent me a message "I'm so tired so I have to sleep" the first night he was there. The thought that they were sleeping in the same bed hit me so quickly, so I was slow to answer. After a few minutes she called. And I hear she says "love you" to me. And I hear she tells her friend "make a smoke to me" so there is no doubt they are sleeping in the same bed. Weird, I think, there are more bedrooms there.
I am thinking about that friendship during the night, and the different versions of the friendship she has brought before. And get pretty unsure what to do. I talk to some friends the next day, and they all agree that it's not acceptable to sleep with another man when in a relationship with someone. So I send her a message without accusing her of something I ask: "What would you have felt if I was sleeping with another lady?". After an hour, I received a message from her friend "We are just friends and there will never be or have been anything between us". Then she calls me and asks me if I'm "calm" saying that he is going to sleep in another apartment that night. That was great, I thought. Well. Next morning she sends me a message: "We do not have sex, we just sleep together, and I have to do as I want." I answer something that I'm talking to friends and everyone agrees that the situation creates too much uncertainty in itself and is something to avoid when in a relationship. "She then answers aggressively." You do not control me ! "No, it's your choice, I answer. Then she attacks the words I use" what friends are this? "And are we really in a" relationship "? You say now that you love me so I interpret it as a relationship, I answer. She becomes silent.
Later in the day she rings and is gentle like a sun and regrets that she was a little aggressive earlier in the day. Well. The theme of the sleep is coming up, and she begins to ask aggressively about what friends I have talked to and she became extremely aggressive. I almost do not hear what she says. Then she ends the conversation. Afterwards she sends me some messages. "What do you think about what I said?". I did not hear what she said. So I asked if she could repeat it. She complained that she never got good answers to things. So I wrote: Please tell me what you have not received good answers and I'll answer as well as I can. Then she asked about my account number and said she would repay me. Then she deletes me on all social media.
The next day, she sent me a message that she apologized for being so aggressive, and wrote that she could not stop thinking about me. But she was extremely hot and cold from day to day after this, much more than usual, until the discard came a month afterwards.

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BiskiT12's picture
Oct 11

She sounds strange


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