I guess I just wanna vent. I don’t know what to do anymore

I guess I just wanna vent. I don’t know what to do anymore. I miss the old life I used to have I miss when my children were young and all the things we used to do together and then my ex-husband left cheated on me destroyed the family.. I too made a lot of mistakes raising my girls .but now they’re grown I live an hour and a half away from them and they totally have disregarded me like a piece of garbage they hardly ever call they don’t have any desire to see me for holidays or for my birthday I am devastated. it makes me sick to my stomach I miss them so much the relationship we used to have I felt was good what happened? it’s gone and I need to move forward. I post a lot on borderline personality because I have that. I figured I would come on the mom site because it’s a mom problem I think . I miss my children and they’re grown and they don’t need me nor do they want me in their life it shows. I went to go visit them they have no pictures of me up all the gifts I’ve ever bought them a place in the back of the closet or in the bathroom. I don’t understand I felt I did everything for them I guess they only see the mistakes I made. they drink all the time they smoke pot all the time, my one daughter she says that she is a Christian and she’s trying not to smoke pot. but she’s the most judge mental towards me she treats me like I don’t exist but she takes care of all the homeless people in the world and goes to different countries to save people but she can’t make time to come up and see me and spend the weekend with me how do you supposed to really move forward and not be suicidal and depressed and lonely and feel you failed as a mother when your children don’t wanna be around you. I want to move forward I do I don’t wanna kill myself but I can’t see happiness without them. Someone told me to talk to them and I did talk to them and they have nothing to say to me they feel that everything is in my head but it’s not not in my head that you don’t come and see me for any holidays or my birthday I didn’t even receive a card how is that in my head. I’m broken

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(2485)
Feb 28

But I’m oldThey’ll let me adopt

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(2485)
Feb 28

@Scat I would adopt but I’m old will they allow me to adopt at my age 55

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Scat's picture
(342395)
Mar 3

@Pauline1234 Not sure

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