Hi everyone. I am not sure if this is due to hormones but I

Nancy2161's picture
[500]

Hi everyone. I am not sure if this is due to hormones but I found out my husband went to a back room with a stripper 10 years ago. I am trying to put it in the past but can't get images out of my head. Any suggestions? We love each other very much and he is very sorry in his lapse if judgment. But I need to move on. Any advice and please don't say drop it it was 10 years ago. I've heard that enough

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Nancy2161's picture
[500]
Nov 19

Well he just brought a part of it up and of course I started to cry but thought of the letter and felt better. He feels so bad. I apologised for acting like that and he said I shouldn't be apologising those are my feelings and it was his fault and he should be apologising. Glad he takes responsibility for his actions and how much it hurt me. Most guys would say it was 10 years ago get over it.

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Nancy2161's picture
[500]
Nov 20

He keeps saying he doesn't deserve me and know it still bothers me. The last thing I asked him was why do/did you always tell your friends not to tell me how much he spent or did. I know nothing happened because one time he did something stupid with another couple and they swore they would never tell me but the next day he confessed they we're all drunk and went skinny dipping I still believe the other two people think I don't know. He keeps saying we will never be happy again. Because I bring up things and ask questions and understands why.Any ideas on what to do? Should I just stop asking questions? He is very angry with his friend and doesn't want to do things with him and work on us. He want to make it up to but I said there is nothing he can do. It's in the past and you can't undo the past. He thinks I'm mad at him because he asked me to returned some boots because right now we are a little strapped for money. Maybe that is a little true because he spent a lot on a stripper when I lost my jobI But I do like to shop for things when I really don't need them and I don't like an eye for an eye thing. Any ideas? I really want to get this out of the way. I also told him when we were done having sex if he sees me close my eyes it is because I am trying really hard to get the image I created of him enjoying himself while she grinded on him. He had a weak moment and I forgave him for that but I want him to stop feeling so bad.

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Goodday's picture
[9560]
Nov 20

@Nancy2161 if I may say it takes time to heal a heart. Maybe start having date nights together and it doesn't have to be out on the town. Stay home, have candle light dinners and enjoy each others company. Stop yourself from thinking about it and let it go when it comes to mind. I wish you all the best in getting thru this together.

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