I'm feeling very alone lately. The last three years have re

I'm feeling very alone lately. The last three years have really tested me. My dad passed away very unexpectedly 3 years ago. I was betrayed and emotionally abused by someone I cared about. And then this last had three family members pass away, health issues and job layoffs life has become hard. I'm married but it's been an unhappy marriage for awhile. I have two teenagers and some days I feel like I'm failing them because I don't have the energy to make it their concerts or sporting events. Or because of what happened to me I'm afraid to be around other people. I work full time but don't feel comfortable talking with co workers.

Littlesis7's picture
Mar 19

Sorry you are experiencing a lot of emotional pain rt now. You could've been exactly describing my life about 10yrs ago. The abuse came at me from several areas that I never thought I'd see. I also raised kids & having to figure out how to be happy w my partner, working a job (w little co-worker interchange) choreograph all the concerts, sports, outward paperwork, org set ups for so many events, fam check-ins, medical, community...and yes deaths causing a lot of grief. The list was endless. Throw in massive hormonal changes and I felt myself going down spinning out of control.
Humans were not designed for all that, all at once. I've never been one to 'keep up the impossible 'IMAGE' that current Society is addicted to -this put me at odds with most everyone around me but you have to be true to yourself!
The hopelessness did push me to get into therapy.
Therapy does help if you are looking to get stuff off your chest. Some ppl have luck w meds but for me, if was a crapshoot. As a Hyper-sensitive person, it became a full-time job just to 'tweek -meds' and I never really fully benefited positively (such a letdown).
I read a lot of DIY self-help therapy, Youtube channels, etc...
What helped me back then was actually being 'in-person' in a group w similar problems, challenges. It was so awesome to share 'nightmare stories' w real humans who were my peers. Finally I was not alone. I wasn't some 'freak' who was lost at sea.
This was a lifeline & as I waited it out, kids grew up and left to do their own thing...some issues still raged but others disappeared. Most of life sux unfortunately -I had to stop blaming myself.
A lot of life is 'Diversion' - Figure out what works in a healthy way for you to release STRESS otherwise it will destroy you.
Don't let it beat you.
If you can't find a local 'in-person' type group look for some Zoom group meetups online.
Or do some 'Personality searches' like Myers-Briggs.com (16 types) free test that shows you a lot about your personality. There's even groups that meet for your specific types. This helped me again- realize I was def NOT alone.

If you look, there are those moments 'in-between' that are healing & can be recognized and allow us to keep choosing to 'show up'.
Sending you good vibes today.

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