How is it possible to be busy 24/7 and yet feel like the lon

QueenBee76's picture
[145]

How is it possible to be busy 24/7 and yet feel like the loneliest person on the planet? Just invisible to others. It sucks....

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Littlesis7's picture
[11605]
Apr 17

@berniro Sorry, nights are very difficult for me also bc I have my days/nights mixed up and I don't jive w the rest of the world. I have to make a huge effort.
All I can say is... congrats on graduating early and AT ALL! I did NEITHER. Now, I'm in a pretty tough place. It would be one thing if I gave up a degree for some great life long friends...but no. I didn't take life plans seriously enough and I'm paying now. I've still got a last bit of energy and emotionally I'm maybe better than a lot of ppl...idk. Hang in there.

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QueenBee76's picture
[145]
Apr 17

I just go through the motions everyday. Yeah some days are great, but of the time I just feel like an invisible hired maid. No one to say, "Hey, how's your day going? What's on your mind today? " I'm a stay at home mom to a awesome autistic kiddo and also have an autistic husband. Both require different approaches to different subjects, topics, and activities. They are both high functioning, but at different ends of the spectrum. So mom is the mediator, the therapist, teacher (homeschool), cook, cleaning lady, zoo keeper (pets), and I'm sure other titles. I love my family, but it's so hard to express that mom needs affection and support too. Up by 7am and to bed around 1-2am daily. My husband helps out as much as he can, but some days he literally can't when he's had a stressful day and needs to decompress. Just to have someone say, "Hey you're doing the best job you can" would mean the world to me. Unfortunately we have zero support from family. Most of tem believe my kiddo just needs an old fashioned butt whipping to get rid of the autism and the others laugh and say my husband has been "this way" all his life. Yea, idiots it's called high functioning autism! I've been with him for 20 years! He got his diagnosis after our daughters. I know I'm not the only one to say how lonely they can feel. I put it out there to simply empathize with others, not to stir gossip.

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Littlesis7's picture
[11605]
Apr 18

@QueenBee76 Wow, you truly ARE dealing with incredible challenges. Kudos to you!!
How's it going, what's on your mind today?...right?!
I'm married to an undiagnosed ADHD highlly intelligent guy that just can't invest in verbally supporting me. He has no ability to NOTICE anything that might move or speak to me. Been together a very long time. Been thru a LOT together but I'm codependent (getting better!) bc he's so SMART & the main breadwinner which is intimidating to me.
I'm grateful my insurance covers talk therapy (sort of ) but it's not enough to get me past a ridiculous "frozen" place of not being able to embrace change and forgive him. He made financial choices that deeply affected our current living.
I'm TIRED after many yrs of raising 3 kids with heavy medical issues. I thank God they are "launched" and moved out. When they leave, you just stand there going 'now what, the caregiving was structured and a reason to get up in the morning. I miss their personalities even if they did take after him greatly and not check in with me very much....that HURTS.
I am learning to reach out a little to things I used to do that made me happy. The struggle is, bc of finances, I don't really have a great place to feel motivated or be able to EXPRESS myself in. The problem is I keep thinking there's just "loads of TIME" for a second debut...ah no. Life's TOO SHORT!
So for now, I'm able to check into SG and connect cyberally lol

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