This week's Brilliant New Topic: It is Thanksgiving next week y'all, where has the year gone???
November 19th, 2020


Hello. I'm new to this site. I've been feeling so lonely lat


Hello. I'm new to this site. I've been feeling so lonely lately. This isn't due to the pandemic; I've always had a hard time making a keeping friends. I feel so defeated because all I want to do is go out and do fun things. I just never have the company to do so. I've been deprived of fun and laughter. I've been trying for months to invite a couple people over for Poker night, but I can't even wrangle in 2 friends to come over. People never show up to my parties or events. The man I'm dating is my rock. However he's lived a very social and exciting past. He brings up all these amazing experiences he's had with his friends, but I just can't help but be envious. I initiate things all the time with people but nobody ever wants to do things with me. I do as much as I can solo. I hike, bike, even go to concerts solo! But at some point you just need to laugh with company. My boyfriend says I'm not trying hard enough and I need to put myself out there, but I truly feel like I am! I don't think I could possibly try any harder to socialize more. I have been sabotaging myself with this never ending need of fun and adventure. My boyfriend and I just took a trip to Seattle for out anniversary. I was so excited to get out of the house and let off some steam, but the trip took a turn for the worst. During our trip my boyfriend told me he no longer wants to have children, something I have longed to do my whole life. This devastated me but I kept myself together. The straw broke the camels back when he wanted to cut the trip short and go home early because "there was nothing to do and it was raining." I got even more frustrated when he said that because he didn't even get a chance to do anything fun while we were in Seattle. We had talked about all these things we wanted to do but we didn't end up doing any of them. I expressed my frustration with that on the drive home and he got very angry with me saying I'm never happy and I can't enjoy anything. It turned into this huge fight. The days following that trip have been rough. I'm trying to accept the fact that I probably won't be having children, while my boyfriend has been giving me a really hard time about me being sad all the time. I am so sick of just watching movies everynight. I'm so bored of life. But I don't know how to change that.

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Nov 22

well i think ur boyfriend should appreciate your company a bit more and appreciate it even when its just the two of you, or when things arent as 'fun' cos sometimes being boring is part of life and u cant just have a rollercoaster all the time. i dont know, just my opinion.

Nov 26

Hi, so sorry for your challenges. After reading everything you have shared, you may want to consider talking to a therapist to just vent and get some of your frustrations out. This may equip you with the tools to handle the social struggles better. It may also help you with your boyfriend since you have hit an impasse about a future with children or even what your time looks like together. Not every moment in any relationship is "fun" or "adventure......we all have responsibilities and there are parts that are just hard. You also want to have a dimension of your relationship where you are just enjoying the two of you whether you are or are not doing something. Reach out for some guidance. Better to know your road now and understand yourself and your needs. You owe that to yourself and to any future relationship. I wish you peace.


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