At night, even when I'm not stressed, I can't fall asleep, a

At night, even when I'm not stressed, I can't fall asleep, and the only way I've managed to deal with it so far is by making a joke out of it. Instead of telling my family I'm going to bed, I tell them that I'm 'going to go stare at my ceiling for hours and hate myself'. We all laugh it off anf then I go do just that. I lie still, then I toss and turn, then lie still, and no matter how comfortable and exhausted I am, it still takes hours for me to fall asleep. I tried taking sleeping pills, but by the time I realize I really do need them that night, it's too late to take them. Even when I do sleep, I feel like I've been up all night. I feel like my body just hates me.

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