Today is our 20th wedding anniversary. It's definitely bitt

Today is our 20th wedding anniversary. It's definitely bittersweet this year. On the one hand, we are still together and working toward reconciliation. On the other, it is our first anniversary since d-day (a little less than three months ago), so everything has changed. It's the first one on which, looking back on the tapestry of our marriage, we have this huge stain tainting it. I know she cheated. I know she risked everything to be with AP. I know she is capable of betraying me, hurting me more than anyone else ever could.

We have a brief getaway planned, leaving this morning for a couple of days away, just the two of us. Hoping I can keep the intrusive thoughts at bay and not become an emotional wreck. Thanks for all of the support you guys have shown me. Don't know what I would do without this group.

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Jun 2

As everyone has advised..Enjoy this time away creating new memories. If you begin to have intrusive thoughts of the affair, quickly shift them to what lies ahead and what you have chosen to do which is move forward and fight for your marriage because it's worth it!! Believe me, I take one day at a time and that's all we can do. Enjoy each other!!!!!


Sorry that this is happening after 20 years of marriage. All marriages drift naturally towards self interests - every couple needs to work to find togetherness again and again. My wife and I like to pray together - almost every day. Our marriage is not perfect and we know we need to ask for God's help. We pray for our marriage and for one another. We pray away any tension or frustration between us. We ask for forgiveness when we have wronged each other. We seek God's guidance to draw us closer together - because we know we can't do this on our own. We ask for God's protection over our marriage. Another thing we do is attend marriage conferences like Christian based "Weekend to Remember". A great place to go for couples wanting to get the spark back. It works for us. God Bless!


Wow. Your situation and mine are almost exact! Our 20’year is this month and I found out 3 months ago about her affair. And we just went on a getaway ( it went great)... but this anniversary seems weird and I don’t even know what to do. It’s like “celebrate what?” I want it to work and we are trying but everything is different now forever.

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