So tonight my soon to be ex wife and kids were at her parent

John99's picture

So tonight my soon to be ex wife and kids were at her parents tonight. While there my father in-law died while taking a nap. It may be petty or inappropriate but I can't help noticing that it was me she called. It is me she has hugged and cried on. It is me she wants spending the night at her moms with her. It is me she wants looking after her mom when she has to go to work tomorrow for a little while. To my knowledge she hasn't even told him. She claims to be in love with him. But when she needed someone she turned to me. I just find this all very interesting. I doubt she will notice who she turned to at this moment.

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Jul 28

@Leahzan Oh man.. I cannot agree with this enough. This is currently happening to me.
My husband can't seem to piece this together either. I asked for at least 2 weeks of non-contact when he left 2 days ago to go back to her.. he loves me more than anything, but he needs to explore some things.. didn't last 24 hours before he was venting to me about something with his university, and then not even 12 hours later sharing about some interesting finance stuff he was reading about. It's painfully obvious to me that she doesn't provide him the mental, emotional, or spiritual support he craves, but he isn't seeing it yet.. sigh. Affair fog and Limerance.. tough places to be in.

Leahzan's picture
Jul 29

@Jayabroad my EX tried to keep me engaged in friendly banter sharing day to day experiences via text. I shut that down quickly by either one word replies or just not responding at all. You don't get to cheat on me and then still expect my companionship (friendship or otherwise). I don't share any of my life with him. I keep it strictly about the kids and nothing else.

andine's picture
Jul 29

@Leahzan: agree. My abuse was different but afterwards he wanted to pretend we were still best friends, delusional. If they are living an immature, self-absorbed existence, playing along only distracts us from having a healthy life with healthy people. If there are children, “where and what time?” is all We need to know. We are not their free therapist. Our codependency issues keep us stuck in relationships going nowhere.

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