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So new here. Just found out my wife of 10 years has had sex

So new here. Just found out my wife of 10 years has had sex multiple times with 2 different guys...found out Friday.. I don't even know how to process it.

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May 17

@Kas1966 My imagination is way worse than anything I hear, I definitely need details or I drive myself crazy.

May 18

@Cheatos, I was there 2.5 years ago dealing with crippling pain of loving someone so much. My journal entries at that time talked about how lucky I thought I was, how incredibly fortunate I was to be married to my best friend. She was literally cheating on me while I was journaling. The pain was intense. And one of the most important things to survive this is to get sleep, which seems impossible when your mind races every time you lay down. I took Unisom most nights for about a year. Please get rest, even if it is forced rest. Your body needs it.

Jimdub's picture
May 23

I am sorry for what you are going through , You mentioned you want to know all the details ,that is perfectly normal ,but you need to delve deeper .I'll explain using an example Iv'e used before to explain marriage counseling and affairs. Think of an affair like a plane crash, Your therapist is the head of the NTSB (National Transportation Safety Board ) and you and your wife are NTSB workers putting the plane back together with the help of your boss ( the Therapist ) you want to find out what caused the plane to crash. If you try to fly the same plane again without knowing what caused the crash of the first one, there is a good chance the second will crash as well. Because the underlying problem that caused the first crash was never discovered and fixed. Also here is a link to some resources that might help, Don't give up faith, the fact that she is willing to go to marriage counseling is a good sign she wants to make it work. The only thing I would add, is to make sure it is a Christian counselor. Because they understand the meaning of " what God brought together, let no man tear asunder". Prayers for you and your bride.

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