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So I'd like to hear from any WS's that are in this group. Di

So I'd like to hear from any WS's that are in this group. Did you think about your spouse at all before or during your affairs? Did you really think you wouldn't get caught? Did you mean to devastate and hurt them? Do you now realize anything about yourselves? Can you understand why you did what you did?

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Merphurts's picture
May 15, 2019

@devastatedinptbo for instance my yelling and being angry is not good because in my mind I'm thinking my husband won't feel guilty unless I do this but in the video they explain that they are probably already ashamed and feel guilty.and do you know what my husband told me, he said when we don't fight and yell I feel really bad for what I've done.

devastatedinptbo's picture
May 15, 2019

@Merphurts yes, been there too.
The videos for the wayward spouse by Samuel are really excellent too. My husband watched a few... I think I watched more, but basically his therapist told him the exact same things. I think if more of the cheaters watched them they would really be able to understand what we are going through and what they need to do.

May 16, 2019

I'm with you outoftheblue72. And, I like your user name. It's exactly how I felt when I found out -- totally out of the blue. I am still struggling as to stay or divorce. It's been since 1/30/18 that I found out. My husband is SUPER supporting to me otherwise, which is why this is so hard. Never a bad word spoken to me. Always supported (and still does) whatever I want to do in my life. A great father and grandfather. But.....the questions are the same that you had. Also, the OW was a friend (our realtor that I have known for 15 years!) So, I feel that I was stabbed in the heart by my husband and stabbed in the back by my friend. I am not certain where to turn. I am 63 and did not think this was going to be my "golden years."


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