Say wha? My WW is mad at me over a conversation I had with

Say wha? My WW is mad at me over a conversation I had with a female former coworker that I showed her on my phone. I wanted to show her that I had nothing to hide and that the conversation was totally appropriate. The idea was to model the kind of transparency I want in our marriage. She says I am throwing this conversation in her face to try to make her jealous and she doesn't care who I talk to, she doesn't need to know. Full disclosure, I did mention a few days ago that I found this woman attractive but was not attracted to her. Again, I was trying to model complete honesty, but looking back maybe I should have just shut my mouth. Confused and frustrated.

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 3

It's a double standard. They know they make poor decisions when it comes to friends of the opposite sex, so they are projecting that on to you.

My wife had an affair with her boss. An emotional affair at the least, most likely physical to some extent.

But yet she lost her mind a few months ago over a two word message I sent to a MUTUAL facebook friend. I literally asked "You good?"... she said: Yeah, and I gave her the thumbs up emoji. Nothing sexual. Nothing inappropriate.

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Kas1966's picture
(169735)
May 3

Its complete immaturity and entitlement. The wws cant handle it if they have to walk in the shoes they made us wear. Good example: my husband had him meet him for dinner which a coworker joined us (golf league) I was pulling into our driveway when my husband called me and was pi$$ed because he thought I was still in the parking lot talking to his coworker, next day he says I think I texted you something bad, I checked, yep he did. Hes text said what you whoring around. REALLY ! He says sorry I was mad. Lol I said take your mad and times it by a thousand ( should have said a trillion ) because that's where I'm at. I had forgotten about that until just now. Its almost like its ok if they do it.

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stepbystep2021's picture

If she has stopped her affair it can be because she really wants to protect the relationship to prevent something else happening. What I find is usually missing from these reactions is the skill to communicate effectively. Most marriages fail after an affair not from the affair but from the behaviours (on either side) after discovery. Consider for a moment if her approach was more like "I heard how you spoke to person x and it had some similarities that I recall from my own poor behaviours, I just wanted you to know I'm really conscious of that now, and I want to bring that to your attention so that we can keep our relationship safe"

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