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It’s such a weird hard scary sad situation. Rebuilding a m

[3620]

It’s such a weird hard scary sad situation. Rebuilding a marriage after an affair. We’ve been rebuilding for 10 months. Some days are amazing until the betrayed spouses thoughts get the best of them!!!!! How long can the cheated on put up with that or want to? I know we shouldn’t feel bad for the ws but how long can they put up with it??? It’s just such a process. Bravo to all that get past it Toft also a big bravo to all that forged through on their own.

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 3
[15710]
Jul 12

Hmm I do not feel bad for my husband when I get a trigger, he created this monster, he will have to deal with my rage and hurt until I can let it go. He had his fun now if he wants to stay with me he will have do whatever it takes to make it better or he can leave. I have no sympathy for him at all.

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I am beginning to heal enough to start to consider my H's feelings. At first, I didn't. I just felt what I felt and said what I needed. If he was willing to stick through it or walk, I was completely fine either way. I knew I deserved better than the way he treated me and he knew/knows it as well.

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FLGirlstuck's picture
[1065]
Jul 13

It's the hardest thing I've ever done, by far. Sometimes I look at my H and think I love you so much I'm glad I stayed. Other times I let the affair creep in and can't even look at him let alone be grateful. It still hurts and I think about it more than I should, but the devastation isn't as strong as it was and I feel better than I did when I first found out. I am 11 months post D-day and I have been told it continues to get better. I think of how far I've come from not being able to get out of bed for 2 weeks and think it must be true. I agree that anyone who has had to deal with this crap deserves kudos. It's not a situation any of us would have chose, but we are pulling through at our own pace and figuring out what's best for ourselves.

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