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In need of support. Tomorrow marks the 30 day period that

Voiceless_screaming's picture

In need of support.
Tomorrow marks the 30 day period that he said he needed to meet my conditions if we are going to stay together. I'm terrified to have that conversation. He hasn't said anything word about it since he asked for the time. And I'm not sure that he has done anything yet. I asked him for the following:
1. End the relationship and friendship with her in a meaningful way and correct the lies he told her.
2. Tell her husband.
3. Seek out anger management.
4. Continue to go to counclling (which is he doing).
I said that I needed these to show that he was choosing me and our relationship over her and theirs. That I wouldn't have to choose myself and walk away if they weren't met because if he won't make me important then I would have to. I'm been a wreck all week thinking of how to confront him about this and how to walk away if I have to. I need reassurce that this is what's right because tonight my resolve is failing and I feel like I deserve what he gave and gives me. He does such a good job of playing the victim that I feel like I'm attacking him when I ask him to do things for me.

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Apr 20, 2017

Be strong. You are not attacking him at all. The things you are asking for are not only reasonable, but generous. I did not give my H 30 days and would not have been able to. He is lucky. Everything you asked for is a drop in the ocean compared w what he needs to be doing. The thing about waywards is that they build up their victimization in their heads in order to justify what they are doing to themselves. And it takes a while for them to readjust their focus into reality. Stand up for yourself and stick to your guns. If he can't do these things then he does not deserve you.


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