I feel a little bit better today. I was married for 28 years

BrokenButConscious's picture

I feel a little bit better today. I was married for 28 years and two months ago I found out that my wife has been cheating on me and is on several websites. I actually got bold enough and called one of the gentleman his number I found and he confirmed that she was setting up meetings at motels and such. I cared and loved this woman with everything I had for 28 years and I would have laid my life down in an instant if I knew it would save her. I've been trying to figure out where I went wrong what I did wrong and it got so bad in the last 2 months I've tried to commit suicide twice. The man in the picture is not the man I am today I can't hold my head up. And I don't even want to go out in public hardly. I have talked with precious intervention and they suggested that I join a group like this with people have been through similar incidents. I just don't even know who I am or what I'm doing anymore.

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Jan 11

@blessedby4 "Men are the pursuers, protectors and providers, being that we are the leaders of our home, it may be incumbent on us to find out what the problems are and to fix them." ----?!?!?!
LOL!!!!!!!! Tell that to all the cheating men!

Piwo33's picture
Jan 11

@blessedby4 I wish I was the leader of my home. I place myself about 6 levels down in the hierarchy in my house. That's below a couple family pets that have greater voting power than I do.

All kidding aside, I think your statement is powerful but the "Men are pursuers.... " statement is pretty old school thinking IMO. It's incumbent upon both a husband and wife to understand where they aren't working and how that is impacting the marriage and then understand if those things are fixable or if they are a fixed part of who each is. It takes an immense amount of work for both to make it work and if infidelity is part of the equation, multiply the work an infinite number of times.

Jan 11

I’m sorry for where you find yourself. That is awful. I’m almost nine months past 2nd DDay, and slowly but surely it does get better, which is impossible to believe only two months out.

It does help to know there are others like us going through this same nightmare.

For me, reading about infidelity helped. I read a lot on marriagebuilders.com. There are helpful books and podcasts out there as well.


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