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I dont really know where to start. I am not very good with w

I dont really know where to start. I am not very good with words, neither am i good at opening up to anyone. Maybe, thast the reason i am where i am. It has been a year since I found my ex, the love of my life, cheated on me. I have not been the same since. I have stopped working out, job, I have basically locked myself in my house. I dont see anyway out.
A year ago I found out the person I was crazy in love with has been cheating on me since the very first day we met. We were a long distance couple, but I trusted her and she trusted me. I told her from the very first day that she has a way out, if he feels this is not working out she can leave, but do not lie or cheat. I told her i would love her just as much and I would be in her life as a friend and all i asked was honesty and loyalty. She said that she doesnt have eyes for any guy but just me, that she would wait for me for a lifetime. How dumb was i to believe that.
I dont know what else to say other than i am drowning and everytime i think i have hit the bottom the bottom keeps breaking and pulling me even further down. you can ask me questions if you want to

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[1745]
Aug 12

@dilynn I am so sorry to hear your story! After such a long time with someone, I would think it would be beyond devastating to hear such news. I understand your hesitation and uncertainty. Just know that you don't have to make a decision today. There is no rush. It took me exactly one year to make the decision to move out and be on my own. I wanted to see if I could make it work and if I could continue living the life I had chosen. It turned me into someone else entirely though and I was not liking that side of me. Plus I was not happy and I didn't feel loyal to him anymore. I didn't want to make the same mistake and hate myself for it. Overall, you need to do what is best for YOU. And take as long as you need to make that decision. And if it means staying, that is okay too! I wish you the best!!

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[1745]
Aug 12

@aberdeendreams I am so sorry to hear about your personal struggles. But whether you want help from others or not, I think you should do something for yourself. You deserve to be happy. Its okay if that doesn't include another person right now. You can be happy on your own! It is possible. I have started going to church again and that has helped me think about others and not myself. Taking the focus off of me so that I can have compassion on others, is really helpful. Also, I saw a counselor for a while, just talking and voicing my thoughts was really nice. I got a new job that keeps me busy enough to help me focus on more things. After a while, you start to move on. It still hurts now and then, but if you can push past it, try to help yourself, I think you will find that you can make it! Whether that is church, a counselor, a friend, a new job/apartment - all of the above! Do it for you.

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[1745]
Aug 12

@aberdeendreams What if you were to rescue a dog? There are so many animals that need help, you are right! But you could help them! Even just rescuing one animal helps SO much! The love you get from an animal is unconditional and they will never discard you. They will always want you, always be SO excited to see you. Always want to be around you. A dog might be perfect for you!!

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