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I am struggling this morning. My wife continues to work wit

I am struggling this morning. My wife continues to work with her affair partner. She told me she set boundaries with him that they should have no communication outside of normal business stuff and that somebody else should be copied on all emails. I asked her last week if she had any contact with him other than normal work emails and she said no. I found out last night that she is exchanging emails with him again that are not work-related. She also had at least one meeting where it was just the two of them (it looked work-related). I haven't found anything racy, but she is smart enough to leave racy stuff out of her work email. I can't confront her because I would reveal my only source of information. She has very little unaccounted for time, so I would be surprised if their relationship is physical. It is entirely possible that their affair is ongoing or starting to rekindle. It is also possible that she thinks nothing of these emails. We are currently separated, but we chat throughout the day and see each other most days. We even have plans to hang out tonight. Am I being paranoid? Am I being a chump? Do I need to wait this out? Is she trying to have her cake and eat it too?

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Jan 10

@BluePants illustrates the importance of the first rule of affair recovery: cut off all contact with the affair partner

Jan 11

Sounds like a situation I was in, however I tried working it out and everything is going bad once again. Once you loose the trust like that the damage is done. You’ll never look at her the same, and trust her has been lost.

I’m sorry that you’re going through this and hope whatever decide works out for you!

Jan 11

You are not being paranoid. Trust your gut. If she is worth being with you two need to see a therapist and make some rules and plans.


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