I am feeling worried about posting here. I had an affair whi

I am feeling worried about posting here. I had an affair whilst with my fiancé. I am struggling to help and understand some of the actions and behaviours of my SO following the affair over a year later and wondered if anyone would be happy to offer advice?

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Jun 23

It really is, he married me and said I do. We both decided therapy could finish. No one held a gun up to him. Honestly, the more I talk about it the more insane it all is and I haven’t even touched the tip of the iceberg with all that’s happened. I appreciate every single person who has commented. It helps me know that I am not going crazy, even when I really feel like I am.

Jun 23

Thank you, it is great to hear the other side, so to speak. The first months after he discovered my affair were rough, for both of us. The anger, the blow ups it was huge but like I’ve said I thought we had come to a better place. Not one where the affair is brushed away but one where it wasn’t used against me when he is mad. Especially when I haven’t done anything wrong and have done everything he asked for. All I asked for was a breather as I am in a deep depression and it’s grown into him being like this. Ugh. I’m so sorry for the long message, I have no one else to talk to at all and this is such a breather for me in a way.

andine's picture
Jun 23

@Worriedalways please do not apologize. Many of us here have been gaslighted to the point of nearly losing our ever loving minds. Sorry your therapists did not pick up on this. You probably need someone who specializes in spousal/domestic abuse. Educate yourself to realize that you are the victim here.

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