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My worst fears came true today. Outside my workplace, I ran

My worst fears came true today. Outside my workplace, I ran into my ex with the woman he left me for. She claimed to have got a place near where I work by accident and here are the results. He knows I go for coffee in mid morning. He knows where I work. Why would they be in my space during work hours when they claim not to want to intentionally hurt me? It's strangely good for helping one let go of any positive feelings as all I feel for him is disgust. I really don't know how to cope with the possibility of meeting them. They have been going together less than a month and I've already seen them.

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Oct 14

Something similar happened to me. My ex and her mother appeared outside of my work one day when I was leaving and then a few weeks later my ex posted a photo of a street around the corner from my work onto her Instagram story just so I would see it.

Oct 14

If he is trying to get you to notice them, he is not wholly satisfied with his new situation and still needs your attention. You can take it to mean you still have power over him. In a relationship with a narc, the narc is actually the weaker person who really needs you. So take it to mean you are still wanted and needed by someone who is beneath you and ignore them when they are around you. If possible, have a friend or co-worker get coffee with you and look like you don't notice him because you have better people in your life. If you have to go near them alone, take a book or magazine or computer and look engrossed and busy so you don't look uncomfortable seeing them together. Or keep busy doing something with your phone if you have to walk past them or they try to talk to you. That should make you look and feel less vulnerable.

ParisVacay's picture
Oct 14

@hgtmpb thank you. I usually go with friends but out there for lunch myself. Usually I walk down the street and am oblivious to who is walking past but now I am hyper vigilant. A bit traumatized. I like your ideas!


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