I recently separated from my husband, he cheated on me with

I recently separated from my husband, he cheated on me with another man. He doesn’t know I know, but he had no hesitation to end the marriage when I brought up being unsure if I should stay or go. If I bring it up he will lose his mind. Logically my brain understands this has nothing to do with me, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. It would never happen in a million years, but I deserve a conversation. I’m devastated, and he appears not to be, which only makes mine worse. And the anger! Woooo eeeee!

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devastatedinptbo's picture
Oct 15

@SuffocatingHeartache I’m so sorry. I hope you have some close friends or family that you can lean on for support right now. A similar situation actually happened to a close friend of mine. The year after we graduated from university her father came out of the closet and left her mother after a 30 plus year marriage. Totally took the whole family off guard. No one had suspected he’d been living a whole separate secret life for years. The were all both devastated by the lies and betrayal and yet felt so much grief and emotion because he had felt the need to hide his true self for most of his life. Still, so unfair for her mother who was left stunned and suddenly single. They did get through it and build a new friendship. But definitely not an easy situation.



That’s good to know, although unfortunate they all had to go through it to begin with. I cannot imagine after 30 yrs and having children. We were only married 5 years, but still we planned on forever. I’m hoping once I get through the anger and hurt I can be have more grace and compassion, bc I would like to be able to build a friendship down the road, I think.

sunfloweraf's picture
Oct 18

@SuffocatingHeartache Just an idea - you mentioned all the things you’d like to say to him. If you aren’t doing it already, it might help you to put some of those thoughts down on paper, so they weigh a little less heavily on your heart and mind. Sending you support.

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