I saw my doctor today for a check-up to get my vaccines and

I saw my doctor today for a check-up to get my vaccines and such, and she gave me a referral to see a psychologist. I was happy in the moment, but very scared now. I’m scared that they won’t get or they won’t understand, and they’ll tell me that I’m actually in the closet. I’m scared that maybe I’m playing make believe or something and these symptoms aren’t real, and that every instance in my childhood that may suggest OCD are false. I mean OCD affects such a little percentage of the population what’s the chance of that being me? What if I’m different, or I’m unfixable, or I say something wrong and get misdiagnosed. I’m terrified, I’ve always wanted to talk to someone who won’t judge me, but part of me feels like they will.

Oct 18

I can understand your feeling scared. I have had some very excellent nonjudgmental and tuned-in psychologists, and then I have had some that were judgmental and didn't understand me or diagnose me correctly. How soon will you be seeing her/him? May I make a suggestion? That is, google them and see what their areas of expertise are. And when you see them, see if you feel safe and comfortable around them. If you do feel safe, then read to them what you have written above. See how they respond. If they are kind, intelligent and non-judgmental, then great. If they act weird or jump to conclusions and label and diagnose you immediately, then they are not well-trained in HOCD, and then you need to tell your M.D. that you need someone who is a better match for you. Do you think you could do any of that?

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