I am new to this so here goes. I was just diagnosed yesterda

I am new to this so here goes. I was just diagnosed yesterday and also found out that my boyfriend has had herpes for the entire time we have been together but was too afraid to tell me. I have gone through so many emotions already. I feel shocked, hurt, betrayed on top of all of the other emotions that being diagnosed with herpes causes (mainly due to the negative stigma associated with it). I keep trying to filter out everything that I am feeling but I don't know what to do. We live together and I trusted him to be honest about everything but he continued to lie until the last second. Even during our conversation I had to sift through the lies he was frantically trying to come up with to get to the truth. I understand that it would have been a very difficult conversation for him to have with me, but we were a team and we would have made it work. We could have been safer, more educated, he could have been honest. It would have been my decision to take that risk or to not. But now it is too late. I just don't know what to do. How can I trust again? Should I even try? I just don't understand. I can't stop crying. I feel so alone.

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(125)
Dec 24, 2014

I am so sorry you are going through this. It is such an awful situation.
I also got this from my boyfriend, however he did not know he had it, and I am having a rough time with that. I can only imagine how you are feeling.
Rather than make a decision right away, try to give yourself some time to sort out everything, then make a decision when you are not as upset. Try to find out why he thought it was okay to not tell you, maybe he thought because he had no symptoms he wouldn't give it to you, there could be other reasons he did not tell you other than being selfish. Give yourself time, this is such a hard disease because of the stigma - the outbreaks are not fun but they can be dealt with, its the emotional part that is the hardest.

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(50)
Dec 24, 2014

Thank you. I know he was not being malicious. He says he just felt ashamed and was too afraid to tell me. He knew I could get it, he just hoped that I would not. I just struggle with all of the emotions associated with this diagnosis right now as well as feeling so angry. I know it is mainly the emotional side of things. I am just struggling so hard right now.

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piikoi07's picture
(5785)
Apr 7

Reversed your COPD? Im thinking this might be a scam.

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