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Honestly, the only reason i haven’t attempted suicide over

Honestly, the only reason i haven’t attempted suicide over these past four months is because I’m a firm believer that if you kill your self you’re goung to hell, if i didn’t believe that i would’ve done it by now... I’m worthless, i can’t offer anybody anything besides herpes. I’m angry and I’m mentally exhausted. I’ve tried convincing myself that I’ve gotten better but i haven’t , I’ve only gotten worse . This is a nightmare & I’m trapped in it. I’ve never felt more useless and dispicable in my life. I’ve never had one guy care about me even before this, now i have it and there’s no hope in thinking that one will care about me now. I find myself looking at guys and thinking they’re cute and then i laugh and ask myself what’s the point , as soon as they find out what I’ve got they’ll be completely disgusted and dismiss me
For the worthless piece of garbage i am. I’m angry. I’m angry that i have this, I’m angry i feel this way about myself but most of all I’m angry that i feel so alone. The person that gave this to me couldn’t even be there and support me for this... if he couldn’t do it a normal person without this can’t even be there and support me through it. I honestly hate my life, nothing is getting better

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I know exactly how you feel

Dec 7

@_ghjdsfrt_ It DOES suck. And maybe we are wallowing in self-pity...who knows? Who cares? We all only have one life to live, so we are allowed to be pissed/terrified/mortified etc about our own personal situations. Yes, I'm sure there are 5 million other people who are worse off than us, but it doesn't feel that way. We are allowed to feel our own pain.

Dec 7

@_ghjdsfrt_ I’m not being ignorant? I was getting ticked off at how you were responding to a lot of people who were tryna help and support you. It kinda came across offensively to everyone else who has herpes. Name calling is ridiculous too. I’ve lived with herpes, seen counsellor a because of herpes, volunteered in sexual health because of herpes, and been severely depressed because of herpes and I’m not anymore because of lack of education . Your entitled to your feelings and it’s a working process, but maybe go see a professional, get a good education about it and realise it ain’t a big deal, stigma is just getting you down. But who knows, I’m apparanty Just ignorant


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