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DATING Everyone has their different opinions on this topi

dark_phoenix's picture
[44060]

DATING

Everyone has their different opinions on this topic. Some say wait and take your time to get to know them very well, others think that would not be fair to both parties who are involved. They think it will be like trapping someone into liking them before telling them OR think it is going to hurt more to be rejected by someone who they take more time to get to know. Everyone has their own way, you will find yours. :)

I have always taken my time anyways so I am all for taking the time to get to know them well first. I need to get to know them to see if they are someone I can trust with my diagnosis and not tell anyone, someone who is not judgmental and seems accepting, and of course other things such as compatibility and stuff like that.

When you are ready for that talk, OWN IT! Do not put yourself in a negative light because that is not you!! Do not let this skin condition make you feel like you are the stigma, because YOU ARE NOT THE STIGMA. Let them know that you have this under control and be ready to answer any questions that they may have.

This does change our dating aspect of life but the way I see it now is that it will help me weed out those whom I cannot trust or would be judgmental of people with this...and I would not want to date someone like that anyways :)

HSV DATING SITES

First off, PROMOTING DATING SITES IS NOT ALLOWED WITHIN THIS GROUP. Some of these sites have brought on more emotional discomfort to some...some charge and try to make money off the weak and vulnerable...some do not keep information private and may sell to 3rd party vendors. We do not want to be responsible for sending anyone into a situation that may make them sad or cause any financial hardship.

Also, do not rush into dating...no matter how or which way you want to get back into the dating scene, it can cause more emotional discomfort if you are not ready. Some people try to date before they are ready, meaning they have not accepted this for themselves first...which just makes it harder. It's a lot easier to have that talk once we accept and learn to live and move on with our lives for ourselves. No one else :)

Once you are ready to date, do it the way you want to and do not feel pressured to join a dating site just because you have an STD. If you want to because that is how you feel comfortable, then do it...but please be cautious in doing so. Some have good experiences, while others do not.

My opinion is that: WHY SHOULD WE LIMIT OUR LOVE and only allow ourselves to see others with HSV???? I strongly believe that we can all find love without placing those limitations. Again, that is just my opinion, so please do what you feel comfortable doing.

Getting ready for the talk:

http://justherpes.com/dating/how-to-tell-someone-you-have-herpes/

http://www.herpes.org.nz/patient-info/herpes-relationships/

http://herpesopportunity.com/downloads/herpes-opportunity-disclosure-handout.pdf

02/08/2015

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[405]
Jan 28, 2019

I have not had sex with the guy I’m with yet. Do you think if we use a condom until I’m comfortable telling him that he will be ok?

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[75]
Jan 28, 2019

@BigWave You're putting him at risk every time you sleep with him even with a condom. Don't be embarrassed, anyone can get it. Just tell him in the best way you know how and pray for the best.

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a_survivor's picture
[78755]
Jan 28, 2019

@SK0781
take all the normal precautions to keep the chances to a minimum. be sure he knows so the decision will be "Jointly Made"... 1)suppressive therapy 2) condoms 3) knowledge of your body's signs will all help...
did you join ProjectAccept.Org yet?

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