My husband died at 65 on May 4 of the brain aneurysm after

[120]

My husband died at 65 on May 4 of the brain aneurysm after battling stage four cancer for a year and a half through many chemo treatment surgeries etc. I am just having a hard time dealing with his death and trying to find my own life I feel very lost sad depressed I am going to contact a support group for more help but wanted to know if there was any great coping skills someone could recommend . I don't know if one feels totally heal but hopefully will be able to live my life which I'm having a hard time doing now . It is a real painful experience I don't have Joy anymore I don't know what to do don't know what to do . I have no energy to do anything and I have been eating too much which I know is not the best but it's just a very hard experience and I just wanted to let you know maybe somebody could give me some good info thanks

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 3
[1315]
Jul 16

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my best friend on June 1 and I'm feeling a lot of the same emotions as you are. I don't think there is a right way to cope. I was already in therapy so that has been somewhat helpful. My best friend was my constant and I haven't felt joy in my life since. I don't have any other friends as close to me as he was, in fact no one has really come out to be helpful. I'm married but he never liked my best friend so I doubt that his words or actions are true. I don't trust people and have been used a lot by my so-called friends. Your not alone in your feelings. I know I'm not helpful but I just wanted to let you know that you weren't alone in your feelings.

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[120]
Jul 16

Thank you for your kind words, and how helpful they are to me today. I have a few friends but don't want to burden them with my pain. I am seeking out therapy as well and hope it will help me cope - I know what you mean about trusting but sometimes it's good to trust a little but not give all. You were very helpful to me just by responding, I was feeling so enveloped in my grief and to know I wasn't alone was a comfort to me - thank you again!

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Anella's picture
[7030]
Jul 17

You both have my sincere condolences. It is true that there is no right or wrong when it comes to coping with grief. I found that out several years ago when I lost nine family members in one year. I was in shock, stunned and couldn't really think clearly for a good while. While we don't want to burden our loved ones, it's best we reach out for help in any way we can. They want to help us but sometimes don't know how. I read a really helpful brochure called "When Someone You Love Dies". It was really great because it shows the stages of grief that everyone goes through; although it may be in a different order or for different periods of time. It helps you to better cope with grief and gives good information for those who want to comfort grieving ones. Also, it has a list of comforting thoughts and expressions in the back that I still read to this day. I'm sharing the link below. Let me know what you think. I'm here for you both.
https://www.jw.org/finder?wtlocale=E&pub=we&srcid=share

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