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I’m really struggling and battling with overwhelming feeli

I’m really struggling and battling with overwhelming feelings right now. My son who is 20 is causing me such pain. He hurts me by his actions. He is inconsiderate and I struggle to want him in my life. I have had to cope with his drugs through high school and psychotic episodes to now him taking lap dances in bars and nearly being killed because he had no money to give the stripper. I’m besides myself and don’t know where to turn. So much pain is ***ociated with bad behaviour and I can’t break free of any of it. Please don’t say something idiotic like you should’ve let them beat him up or kick his *** out because neither is viable or reasonable. I’m looking for support from someone who has gone through similar horror or just a sympathetic ear.

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Oct 10

@Pushover you're welcome. I'm sure a lot of mothers would feel ashamed and I'm sure we would feel every thing you feel. I do know that NA and AA are anonymous so if you contacted one of them at least it would be private. I'm sure if you called one of their numbers they could hook you up with someone to talk with and maybe they have a younger guy that could talk to your son. Are his sisters older than him? Maybe one of them could play hardball with him and get him to talk and find out what his **** problem is that he has to be acting out the way he is. I think you should find more support for you that could help turn things around. I'm sure you could use support and guidance. I'm sure you are wore down so that's even more reason for you to put any shame you have aside and ask for help there where you live because you know that you can't do this alone. Don't give up I'm sure you feel very defeated but that's more because you tried to do this on your own for too long. All i know is if hes had drug problems or drinking problems NA and AA are both good places to start and basically free with plenty of people that will give support. Get help from every place you can for both of you. You have to get stronger by getting help so you can deal with your son for his own good and yours.

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Oct 13

Dear NS (and others)thanks for your thoughts and wisdom. This has really beaten me down. The need to escape is very real right now as the pain spin is too great and I’m tired and worn out from pretending all is well. Has anyone had any experience with a no- win situation. My not winning is finally catching up with me. I find I don’t even smile anymore. I mistrust the medical system for many reasons. There is not a lot of other avenues. I will as you say, try the NA or AA. I’ve applied to work abroad teaching and hope that for my own sanity I can plan a legitimate escape God willing. I just want to feel life again and let my heart breathe instead of being trampled upon by so many factors outside of my control. Thanks everyone for your insight.

Oct 16

I think you misunderstand. It’s his behaviour and drug abuse I wish to escape from. I will always be his mother, hence my pain. And btw, I am getting counselling and plenty of help to maneuver through this dark time thanks.


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