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so i had a question. ive been struggling to figure out wheth

so i had a question. ive been struggling to figure out whether im getting hurt or not. i have an endless cycle with my parents when they act nice and then they flip around and remind me that they are "my parents, not my friends" and they begin to say some weird things. ive always considered from a young age that my parents were nice people, since everyone that met them said so. since my dad was an abuse victim, i thought that he would never ever want to hurt me and that made me feel safe. since i was 11, though, i realized some of the things they said were not quite right. on the way to school my mom would talk about how i needed to work out more, and she would frequently comment (since i did a kids running program one spring) that i "was not as fit as the other kids" so i needed to walk, which was "on my level". at the time, i only thought my mother was looking after me and i was making a big deal out of it (i was sensitive about my weight, though not overweight, and had some eating issues). when i brought up a topic at the dinner table, my dad would always talk about it like everything was wrong unless it matched up to what he said. he refers to my opinions like i am too flimsy to make my own, and i am too stupid to even mention. and when i was placed into the gifted program, he genuinly looked surprised. i remember doing an engineering assignment a few weeks ago (a class he picked out for me), and showing it to him. he started yelling at me, saying that i was lazy and i didn't put it any work. my mom called it a peice of crap. i thought he was just mad because he liked engineering, and deserved to be yelled at. he always makes sure he moniters my devices, like parents normally do, so i gave him my tablet to let him look it over. he started going through my friends private conversations, and since my friends have always been there to support me, i stood up for them. as usual, he didn't care about my opinion, and he started yelling at me about how i should find different friends. i broke down crying, and then he started to laugh and say "see, you don't know anything. you're a kid, and you're so ignorant you don't even know what you don't know". i was so humiliated. and it wasn't even the words it was like this tone of voice that talked to me like i was 5. and i felt so bad about it. these are the ones that i remember the most, but there were lots of other small, things that made me feel like something was wrong. i remember comparing myself to other kids and being so surprised when their parents spoke highly of them in front of their friends. i feel kinda bad everytime i consider that they did something wrong, and no matter how forceful they've been they haven't really hit me that much. i just need to know if somethings wrong or not, so i can ease my mind and try to fix some problems

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Jun 29

@Oneseedatatime im around 13? i don't feel that comfortable discussing my age but im still pretty much a kid. and yes, i have tried multiple times to talk to them about how i felt about what they kept saying. most of the time, it ends in my mom saying that im ungrateful and my dad looking at me like im crazy. one time they even put my in therapy. i wish i was able to get through to them, but part of the reason why they say the stuff they do is because they refuse to listen to me or my other sibling. the main thing that i do in the meantime is try to not care what they say about me.

18 hours ago

Hi @kat298,

Yes, you are a teen, that's ok, you have feelings too! There are two sides to every story and a balance we must find in between. Therapy? That's a great investment in you. How was it? Are you still engaging in therapy?

14 hours ago

Hi so even I have been going through the same thanks to you I found out what was happening to me is not ok. I am actually the same age and I feel horrible.


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