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I have been doing pretty well at not reacting to the tactics

I have been doing pretty well at not reacting to the tactics and attempts to pick arguments. However, I think this is causing him to escalate in order to try to get a reaction. It's like watching the Tasmanian devil go from bringing me flowers, to using pity ploys, to condescending remarks, to major projection, asking if I want a divorce while in line at a kids' hay ride, and now the silent treatment followed by leaving the house for 2 hours without saying a word. That's a new one for him. I'm just sitting back and watching it all, realizing it for what it is. But I have to say I'm a little nervous about how much he'll escalate. He has never hit me but has become physical before (blocking me from doorways, picking up the edge of a mattress to toss me off, then yelling obscenities at me while I'm lying on the floor because my head hit a lamp). opening my car door into a brick wall when I tried to leave, etc. It has been over a year since anything physical like that happened, but I have no idea what's coming next.
Doing the best I cant to not react, but he's manipulating that by keeping me on my toes and wondering what's about to go down.

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[4975]
Oct 15

My situation also escalated when I stopped indulging the narc and ignoring her temper tantrums. In my case it was my older sister and she was also incredibly violent like your husband. It will get worse. When they can't get the reaction they want, they will feel that you are abusing them, that you have a bad temper. There will probably be name calling and he might slander you to friends. My sister became less violent when I stood up to her a lot but the verbal abuse escalated because it became her only outlet to vent all her hatred and rage. Your husband sounds like the type to get more violent especially if he is much stronger than you. So proceed carefully. Is there anyone you can go to for help?

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[4975]
Oct 15

My situation also escalated when I stopped indulging the narc and ignoring her temper tantrums. In my case it was my older sister and she was also incredibly violent like your husband. It will get worse. When they can't get the reaction they want, they will feel that you are abusing them, that you have a bad temper. There will probably be name calling and he might slander you to friends. My sister became less violent when I stood up to her a lot but the verbal abuse escalated because it became her only outlet to vent all her hatred and rage. Your husband sounds like the type to get more violent especially if he is much stronger than you. So proceed carefully. Is there anyone you can go to for help?

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[805]
Oct 16

There are places I can go in a pinch, but I can't take my daughter out of state (where my parents are) and I can't financially afford to go anywhere else right now. I'm saving up and right now it feels like I have some time.....he has gotten less physically aggressive over the past year, I think since the cops were called a couple of times and he's terrified of jail. It's not that I don't realize it can escalate again- and yeah, he outweighs me by a good 75lbs- I'm just in a bind and biding my time. If it gets bad I will call the police again.
He has been in a good mood the past few days. The first day it actually made me mad and I wasn't falling for it. But now I'm just exhausted and don't have it in me to fight or make any big moves when I don't need to. I'm waiting for the bad times to start again and will do what I have to when the time comes. So tired and it's all I can do to make it through work right now. Having people to chat with on here is a little spark in my day.

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