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"Healthy Boundaries" What does this mean to you? If you're

Living4Peace's picture
[39855]

"Healthy Boundaries"
What does this mean to you? If you're relearning them like many of us who've been abused, where are you at in the process of learning what yours are and how to enforce them in a healthy way?

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 3
BillyG's picture
[215]
Oct 16

Boundaries are one of those things that are very misunderstood. I feel they are a must in order to protect yourself. Don't see boundaries as a negative thing, they are healthy. You make the choice, what feels comfortable to you. If you don't want to don't.

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mmadlecl's picture
[47490]
Oct 17

@BillyG and Living4Peace I was terrible at setting boundaries. That's one reason I married my 2nd husband who had surmountable problems. Yes, boundaries are healthy, but they are actually pretty complicated. Not only do you have to know how to set them for yourself, but you have to respect other peoples boundaries. For some reason I was good at respecting other peoples, but not good at setting them for me. This is probably where most people do fall short. Not understanding boundaries is one of the 5 core symptoms of codependence. Pia Mellody's book "Facing Codependence" has a section dedicated to boundaries which taught me a lot. Narcissists are actually codependent and exhibit these symptoms. They don't understand and cross boundaries which is only one of the many problems with them.

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BillyG's picture
[215]
Oct 22

Very true words. In my case he didn't see anything wrong with it. I was crazy, jealous and over reacting. Every married man has woman friends on the side. There are alot of great books on the subject and like you I had to teach myself how to build them

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