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hey, I'm new to the group. Ive been bulimic for three years

hey, I'm new to the group. Ive been bulimic for three years now. Every time I was thinking of getting help, I kept telling myself that its not that bad and that I won't do it again but everyday was and is the same.It has become the biggest struggle of my life and stops me from living normally. Some days are worst than others, but when I'm eating healthily , its perfect, but it doesn't last for long. Its so stupid to write to the people I don't even know, but some of you have the same problem and maybe you have fought it and can help me .

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Jan 11, 2018

@elene well, do u expect me to say yes which will encourage you to do it? then no, If you start, I don't think its possible to stop

nolonger's picture
Jan 11, 2018

Hey Katekhdnva
I guess most of us here know exactly the feeling you describe - that the bulimia is the biggest struggle we face, but that we can overcome it, just after this one binge it will be all over.
I have been to therapy but abandoned that since I did not feel comfortable with the approach which was offered to me (either medication or stationary).
I have chosen to walk the path of recovery alone (knowing that I am never/always alone) and am slowly getting there.
The biggest steps but I have taken during the last year I guess. See, the biggest difficulty by trying to do it all by myself I figured out was my distorted perception;
For a long time I THOUGHT that I was eating healthy and always got confused when I fell back into the b and p cycle.
ONLY AFTER I REALISED THAT WHAT I THOUGHT AND WHAT IS were sometimes very different things, I really started to recover.
(e.g. I used to eat WAY TO LESS carbs and would binge on foods rich in carbs after a week or two. I had to figure out first that I was eating way too little carbs and am now consciously changing that - what takes a lot of energy and effort, but helps me to get healthy).
So I ask you to be honest with yourself - how healthy is your healthy?
Have a wonderful day!

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nolonger's picture
Jan 11, 2018

@elene usually the approaches which reduced my body weight were the ones which did not help. I think part of any eating disorder is to let go of the concerns about the weight, to make peace with oneself.
I am still recovering from bulimia and have been gaining weight lately, however, simultaneously I feel healthier and happier than ever during the last couple of years.


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