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Im still struggling after 2 1/2 years. My ex and I separated

Im still struggling after 2 1/2 years. My ex and I separated Feb 2016 and divorced end of last year. We have a young child together. After we split he immediately wanted nothing to do with me and took all of his money which was fine I made it work. I begged for counseling but he refused. He immediately stopped loving me. He kept telling me to move on bc he had. Well 6 months in I find out he’s with his coworker (also someone I considered a friend). It broke me into pieces and he wanted me to accept it. Then on and off he would call and say he loved me more now than he did when we were married come by to get our son and touch me inappropriately. I’ve stopped all that and try to have the least amount of contact. He said his gf is insecure about me and found where we were texting but it was mostly him being inappropriate. Now fast forward to present day. I am dating a wonderful man that treats me and my son like gold. Trying to move on with life but there are days I still struggle . I get bad anxiety when I’m around town by myself bc I’m so scared to bump into my ex and his gf. When he comes to get our son he insists on staying for almost an hour and helps himself to my food and lounges on my sofa. Smacks my butt and jokes around. If I say anything about it my son gets upset and tells me I’m being mean to his daddy stop trying to kick him out again. He tells me I kicked his daddy out that’s why his daddy won’t come home. My son knows we are divorced and knows we are dating other people. And u try to explain to him that daddy is being inappropriate but he’s 5. It really gets under my boyfriend’s skin but he is respectful and tries not to say much. I feel like I’m stuck and can’t move forward. I don’t know what to do. My ex keeps asking when me and my bf are moving in together (bc he lives with his gf at my cousins house - weird I know) I keep telling him I’m not ready. I have my own house and my bf has his own. We do not plan to live together until we marry which I’m nowhere near ready for that either. I never ask about his gf ever. He makes fun of my bf to mutual friends and always cracks jokes. I don’t understand why he cares since he didn’t want me back. I just need help coping and moving forward with my life.

We are very active in our church (me, bf, and son) and my ex hates that as well. He calls me a hypocrite and a Bible thumper. Tells me I’m ruining my sons life with these lies.

I’m just lost right now. I wish I didn’t love him still I know I don’t want to be with him but I still hurt bc I still have love for him.

Amy Advice?

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[90815]
Jul 11

@Graceonfire, since his gf doesn't know jack about what an arse he is, it would be interesting if you offered to drop your son off and pick him up at his and his gf's house. He wouldn't pat your rear then; now would he?

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[90]
Jul 11

@eddie1975 boundaries are exactly what I need. It’s hard since him and his gf live with my cousin only 4 miles down the roads I have cut off that party of my family bc they sided with him.

Yes he is wonderful. We started going together, joined together, and were baptized together. He is very involved and really takes in what our pastor says as well as I do. It’s very important for both of us to keep God as our center. I have my son and he has 2 teenagers. I feel like God put him in my life for a reason and we both are ok with taking it slow and praying on things. God will lead us both. ❤️ My son tells his dad John 3:16 verse all the time and his dad fusses at me bc my son keeps asking if he believes and telling him he’s going to perish. His prayers are every night for his daddy to come to church. That part is so sad. He just wants his dad to feel how he feels when he goes to church. My son is very loved there.

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[90]
Jul 11

@Scat no he wouldn’t but I can’t physically be around her . My anxiety would be too much bc she was my friend I confided in when we were having issues. I feel like she laughs at me bc she “won” my husband. It’s just not a step I’m willing to take yet until I fully heal.

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