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I'm not sure my last and first post made it, but 3 months ag

Dangumm's picture
[465]

I'm not sure my last and first post made it, but 3 months ago my wife came home from work and said she wasn't in love with me anymore and left. Since then our divorce is almost final. At the same time we meet to see each other at least once a day, we text all day long and we talk on the phone several times daily. I don't get it. She says she loves me but she is not in love with me. I love her so much, I don't know what to do.

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Dangumm's picture
[465]
Nov 8

I know what she is doing I just can't seem to break ties with her. I still want her back.

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[275700]
Nov 8

@Dangumm, The truth is, she felt guilty because you were sick, so she stayed, hoping you'd get better, but thinking you could possibly die. This is almost identical to what happened to me. That's why I'm telling you this for your own good. I really think she felt obligated to stay with you when you were ill. It's exactly what my husband did when I had cancer. But once she found out you were out of the woods, she knew she couldn't cash in on life insurance and that she wouldn't look as bad leaving now, she left. It is the same with my husband. He felt guilty fooling around or leaving because I was sickly and dying. After my surgeries he knew I could still die later. He knew I had a trust my mother left me, of property worth a bit of money. But it turned out I survived. More lately he's gotten tired of waiting for me to die. He also knows I'm tired of him wh*ring around and won't tolerate another day. So he was holding out, hoping I'd leave so he could get our house and he wouldn't have to sell it. But now I'm filing a separation so he'll have to sell and pay me maintenance (alimony). He's still crazily trying to force me to be he one that ends it legally so he'll look good to the six grown children we have. He wants me to look like the bad guy that ended things even though he was the one that was cheating. It's all about their precious reputation, their guilty conscience, their hope of cashing in on our going to eternity, and their selfish desires to commit adultery without dealing with the consequences. That's just my take.

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[275700]
Nov 8

@Dangumm, she's an addiction to you. It seems sadly, you may have to go NO CONTACT. Meaning, you may have to go cold turkey, go through withdrawls like an addict. And truly, I know this is humiliating because I'm going through the same thing but the relationship is like a drug. You had all these emotional highs and lows that actually did change your body chemistry, so much so that it negatively impacted your health. Same for me. So today and yesterday my husband was angry with me for calling him on his bee ess wh*ring around. So he didn't call me. And I also told him to stop calling too. So today was the first day I had an ounce of energy in years. All because I went no contact. I really feel I am better off NOT talking to him and maybe you will be too if you go NO CONTACT with your estranged wife.

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